Lean Left For a long time (dating even back to those days when I considered myself a Republican) I’ve wondered how it is that the GOP got such
June 7, 2005
For a long time (dating even back to those days when I considered myself a Republican) I’ve wondered how it is that the GOP got such an exclusive hold on the “Christian vote” when so many of the policies they espouse run directly counter to Christian teachings. I tried very hard to reconcile GOP positions with Christian teachings on such topics capital punishment, war, taxation, poverty, etc., but try as I might, I just couldn’t do it. Their positions seemed to resemble those of fundamentalist Jews (who would obviously reject the New Testament) more than anything else.
But recently the answer hit me.

In the seriousness of my study of Christian teachings, I was missing something that should have been painfully obvious: Jesus was joking! Silly me, it didn’t occur to me to even consider that the Messiah should have a sense of humor about such things, but when viewed through that lens, everything makes so much sense.

For example, take Jesus’ teaching on prayer:

“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”

What a kidder, that Jesus! After all, everyone knows that you’re supposed to pray loudly and proudly for all to see before you do pretty much anything: eat a meal; start classes at school; play football; start a legislative session; graduate; become inaugurated as President of the United States; and so on. How else are you supposed to identify the heathens if you don’t get everyone to pray out loud everywhere they go before they do pretty much everything? And everyone knows that you’re supposed to not only incessantly ask for stuff, but to ask this “in Jesus’ name.” Read on...

 

    Learning About America's Taliban
     
    Crooks and Liars readers who want to learn more about the very real threat posed by the Christofascist attempts to take over America should check out a couple of websites that would be of interest: www.TheWall-OnChurchAndState.com
     

    Can you help us out?

    For nearly 20 years we have been exposing Washington lies and untangling media deceit, but now Facebook is drowning us in an ocean of right wing lies. Please give a one-time or recurring donation, or buy a year's subscription for an ad-free experience. Thank you.

    Discussion

    We welcome relevant, respectful comments. Any comments that are sexist or in any other way deemed hateful by our staff will be deleted and constitute grounds for a ban from posting on the site. Please refer to our Terms of Service for information on our posting policy.
    Mastodon