Crooks and Liars

Thursday April 9, 2009 02:00 pm

New C&L Flash Player! The Daily Show: Full Metal Budget and Lieberman wants his laser planes

By John Amato
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(h/t Heather for the video)

Jon Stewart reminds us that comedy is not dead. Robert Gates, the SOD told the world that he's recommending a cut in military defense spending. In his defense Budget we now are fighting three different kinds of wars:

50% was for conventional wars
40% all types of wars
10% for irregular wars

Say, what? Then Gates outlines some of those beyond the future type military weapons that will be cut because they just plain suck.

Gates: We will cancel the second airborne laser prototype aircraft.

Stewart: Noooo. not the laser plane. You're cutting the laser plane? That's my favorite ridiculously expensive yet comically looking plane. Give me one good reason why we're losing that?

Gates: The program has significant affordability and technology problems and the program's operational was highly questionable.

Stewart: It's an expensive useless piece of sh&t. I guess you'd have to be a total jackass to be upset about losing laser planes.

Lieberman: Secretary Gates is specifically recommending the termination of a program of development called the airborne laser, this is a really important program we're developing which gives us the unique capacity to hit missile in its boost phase before it even gets its normal arc.

Stewart: Please don't take away my laser plane.

(Here's our new C&L flash player. We're slowly integrating a few more changes. After a few weeks we'll be making them all embeddable.)

(UPDATE: A major hat tip to Bob Cesca for the wicked graphic design on the player)