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The Fly On The Wall: White House Press Credential Interviews Yellow Dog Blog

And now, it's time for another episode of Fly on the Wall. This feature, a public service of the Yellow Dog Blog, gives you the opportunity to eavesdrop on meetings of vast importance. In this edition, we check in on press-credential interviews in the White House press office. Let's listen:

Press Officer: Good morning. For whom did you vote in 2004?

Reporter 1: Why?

Press Officer: National security question.

Reporter 1: Uh.... John Kerry.

Press Officer: Next!

Reporter 2: Sieg Heil! Don't mess with Texas.

Press Officer: Well, good morning! I guess I don't need to ask after that greeting, but for whom did you vote in 2004?

Reporter 2: Why, Dubya, of course. You don't think I would have voted for that tree-huggin', welfare-givin', Jane Fonda lover do you?

Press Officer: Well, some people did. In fact, [whispering] our people in Ohio say more people there probably voted for Senator Kerry than for the President.

Reporter 2: I always say, what the American people don't know, won't hurt 'em.

Press Officer: Bingo! You'll be a fine addition to our White House press corps.

Reporter 2: Praise Lee Atwater!

Press Officer: Now, can you give us some sense of what your actual background is in journalism?

Reporter 2: Well, I was editor of the Young College Republicans newsletter, The Right-Wing Fascist Weekly.

Press Officer: Catchy name.

Reporter 2: Thank you. Liberal campus administrators made us tone it down.

Press Officer: But have you ever actually done any reporting on a more national level and on government affairs in particular?

Reporter 2: I can't say I've done very much "reporting" in the traditional, liberal-dominated-media sense.

Press Officer: But you seem like our kind of guy. What is your journalism background?

Reporter 2: Well, I've written some very hot e-mails and posed for some racy nude photos on military-studs-for-hire.com.

Press Officer: Isn't that also a male escort or [whispering] male prostitution service?

Reporter 2: Prostitution is such a liberal way to put it. We liked to call them "male maneuvers" if you know what I mean.

Press Officer: Gotcha. We're actually far more concerned about the kind of questions you'll ask President Bush if we give you a White House press pass.

Reporter 2: Believe me, I know how to be gentle with another man.Press Officer: Bingo! You'll be a fine addition to our White House press corps.

Reporter 2: Praise Lee Atwater!

Press Officer: Now, can you give us some sense of what your actual background is in journalism?

Reporter 2: Well, I was editor of the Young College Republicans newsletter, The Right-Wing Fascist Weekly.

Press Officer: Catchy name.

Reporter 2: Thank you. Liberal campus administrators made us tone it down.

Press Officer: But have you ever actually done any reporting on a more national level and on government affairs in particular?

Reporter 2: I can't say I've done very much "reporting" in the traditional, liberal-dominated-media sense.

Press Officer: But you seem like our kind of guy. What is your journalism background?

Reporter 2: Well, I've written some very hot e-mails and posed for some racy nude photos on military-studs-for-hire.com.

Press Officer: Isn't that also a male escort or [whispering] male prostitution service?

Reporter 2: Prostitution is such a liberal way to put it. We liked to call them "male maneuvers" if you know what I mean.

Press Officer: Gotcha. We're actually far more concerned about the kind of questions you'll ask President Bush if we give you a White House press pass.

Reporter 2: Believe me, I know how to be gentle with another man.

Press Officer: Uh, OK. Well, let's try some questions. Pretend I'm the President and you want to ask about progress in the Iraq war.

Reporter 2: OK. "Mr. President, how do you answer critics who say we had no reason to invade Iraq, that the effort has ruined our reputation and is bankrupting the national treasury?"

Press Officer: Funny.

Reporter 2: Sorry, I kid sometimes. "Mr. President, are we close to leaving Iraq and turning the country back over to its own people?"

Press Officer: Softer....

Reporter 2: "Mr. President, how are you holding up under the strain of your tremendous responsibility?"

Press Officer: Softer still...

Reporter 2: "Mr. President, when are the liberals in Congress going to stop supporting terrorists and get behind your heroic efforts?"

Press Officer: Keep going...

Reporter 2: "Mr. President, will the Attorney General be filing charges against the activist judges who killed Terri Schiavo?"

Press Officer: That's it! Beautiful.

Reporter 2: I wasn't too harsh was I?

Press Officer: No, perfect. You're going to fit in just fine.

Reporter 2: Wow, to think, just last month I was dating men twice my age. Now I'll be a real White House correspondent.

Press Officer: Do you have any objections to us, uh, providing you questions to ask the President?

Press Officer: Uh, OK. Well, let's try some questions. Pretend I'm the President and you want to ask about progress in the Iraq war.

Reporter 2: OK. "Mr. President, how do you answer critics who say we had no reason to invade Iraq, that the effort has ruined our reputation and is bankrupting the national treasury?"

Press Officer: Funny.

Reporter 2: Sorry, I kid sometimes. "Mr. President, are we close to leaving Iraq and turning the country back over to its own people?"

Press Officer: Softer....

Reporter 2: "Mr. President, how are you holding up under the strain of your tremendous responsibility?"

Press Officer: Softer still...

Reporter 2: "Mr. President, when are the liberals in Congress going to stop supporting terrorists and get behind your heroic efforts?"

Press Officer: Keep going...

Reporter 2: "Mr. President, will the Attorney General be filing charges against the activist judges who killed Terri Schiavo?"

Press Officer: That's it! Beautiful.

Reporter 2: I wasn't too harsh was I?

Press Officer: No, perfect. You're going to fit in just fine.

Reporter 2: Wow, to think, just last month I was dating men twice my age. Now I'll be a real White House correspondent.

Press Officer: Do you have any objections to us, uh, providing you questions to ask the President?

Press Officer: What's your name, son?

Reporter 2: Well, at military-studs-for-hire.com they called me I.M. Huge, but you can call me Jeff. Jeff Cannon. Yeah, I like the sound of that.

Press Officer: And would it be possible for us to take another photo for your press ID? All the pictures you submitted are of you, well, naked.

Reporter 2: No problem.

Press Officer: Quick, who do you work for?

Reporter 2: The people!

Press Officer: Hey, hey, hey...

Reporter 2: Kidding!

Press Officer: Welcome to the Bush White House

 

Introducing La Shawn B.'s Groundhog Day

TCFW is proud to introduce La Shawn B.'s Groundhog Day, the continuing saga of a Black woman trapped reliving a life not of her own choosing, a day of unending events that repeatedly challenge her faith, Conservative values, and sanity.

 La Shawn B.'s Groundhog Day is a collaboration between the immensely talented Reporter 2: Heck no. Saves me the trouble.

Press Officer: What's your name, son?

Reporter 2: Well, at military-studs-for-hire.com they called me I.M. Huge, but you can call me Jeff. Jeff Cannon. Yeah, I like the sound of that.

Press Officer: And would it be possible for us to take another photo for your press ID? All the pictures you submitted are of you, well, naked.

Reporter 2: No problem.

Press Officer: Quick, who do you work for?

Reporter 2: The people!

Press Officer: Hey, hey, hey...

Reporter 2: Kidding!

Press Officer: Welcome to the Bush White House



No, it is not a joke     

more on the secret scandal...


SOON THERE WILL ONLY BE ONE

When I was a young man starting out on Long Island, everyone there banked either with the Meadowbrook National Bank, Central Federal Savings and Loan or the Franklin National Bank.  They were our local institutions, and we were loyal to local businesses.  That’s the way things were done back then.  Today, it doesn’t work that way.
The Meadowbrook National Bank was taken over by CIT Financial, which sold it to The National Westminster Bank of England, which sold it to Fleet Bank, which was recently sold to the Bank of America.  Central Federal was sold to Manufacturer’s Hanover Trust, which was sold to the Chase Manhattan Bank, which was then sold to Chemical Bank, which decided to change its name to Chase Bank and the acquire JP Morgan Bank so that it is now called JP Morgan Chase.  Franklin National was sold to a Dutch bank which renamed it the European American Bank.  That, in turn was sold to Citibank.  Whew!

Merger fever is upon us folks, and it isn’t going to disappear soon.  Our current administration is encouraging big business to become bigger, at the expense of us little folk.  Soon, I expect that there will be one big bank, one video chain, one supermarket, and one company making all of our pharmaceuticals.  Fascism is defined as a system of government in which the needs and desires of corporations take precedence over the needs and desires of the general population.  The unrestricted growth of mega corporations, the outsourcing of our jobs to Asia and countless other policies of the current Bush administration lead me to believe that the current leaders of our country are not Republicans.  They are true fascists, in the mold of Mussolini and Francisco Franco, and that my friends does not bode well for the democratic (small ‘d’) ideals of our country

When I was a young man starting out on Long Island, everyone there banked either with the Meadowbrook National Bank, Central Federal Savings and Loan or the Franklin National Bank. They were our local institutions, and we were loyal to local businesses. That’s the way things were done back then. Today, it doesn’t work that way.

The Meadowbrook National Bank was taken over by CIT Financial, which sold it to The National Westminster Bank of England, which sold it to Fleet Bank, which was recently sold to the Bank of America. Central Federal was sold to Manufacturer’s Hanover Trust, which was sold to the Chase Manhattan Bank, which was then sold to Chemical Bank, which decided to change its name to Chase Bank and the acquire JP Morgan Bank so that it is now called JP Morgan Chase. Franklin National was sold to a Dutch bank which renamed it the European American Bank. That, in turn was sold to Citibank. Whew!

Merger fever is upon us folks, and it isn’t going to disappear soon. Our current administration is encouraging big business to become bigger, at the expense of us little folk. Soon, I expect that there will be one big bank, one video chain, one supermarket, and one company making all of our pharmaceuticals. Fascism is defined as a system of government in which the needs and desires of corporations take precedence over the needs and desires of the general population. The unrestricted growth of mega corporations, the outsourcing of our jobs to Asia and countless other policies of the current Bush administration lead me to believe that the current leaders of our country are not Republicans. They are true fascists, in the mold of Mussolini and Francisco Franco, and that my friends does not bode well for the democratic (small ‘d’) ideals of our country. But That’s Just My Opinion...

 
 
No, it is not a joke     ReBelleNation
more on the secret scandal...
 
President George W. Bush Accused of Rape in Lawsuit?
Submitted by John Brown 

George W. Bush accused of rape in court papers in the State of Texas? Is some kind of sex scandal brewing? According to the documents inside this very article, it sure looks like he's being accused of a whole array of things by a person named Margie Schoedinger!

. But That’s Just My Opinion...



Anatomy of a Smear

It's always interesting to check out the latest e-mail forwards. Some are funny, some are retreads of decades-old urban legends. But there's another big category: right-wing propaganda. In some cases, the groups overlap-- like the still circulating claim that sinister liberals are trying to ban religious broadcasting. That was a chain letter before the Internet, and it still gets passed around, even though it's nonsense.

But a recent posting on the above site demonstrates another means by which some over-wrought rightie spreads fictitious stories about prominent Democrats. The latest: Hillary Clinton snubbed the mothers of veterans. The tip-off this time is that the e-mail cites Newsmax as the source of its info. Newsmax, of course, is a far-right website that specializes in attacking progressives. Usually without justification.
From the forward:

"Gold Star Mothers is an organization made up of women who sons were killed in military combat during service in the United States armed forces. Recently a delegation of New York Gold Star Mothers made a trip to Washington, DC to discuss various concerns with their elected representatives. According to NewsMax.com there was only one politician in DC who refused to meet with these ladies. . .

. . . You got it! None other than the Queen herself, The Hildebeast, Hillary Clinton. She refused repeated requests to meet with the Gold Star Mothers."

It's a timely claim, in a way, since the right is outraged that she might be running for president. It's also completely false. Here's what the Gold Star Mothers themselves had to say about the "incident" on their official site:

"With regard to the NewsMax article concerning our organization, the American Gold Star Mothers, Inc., deeply regret the misunderstanding about Senator Hillary Clinton. The two mothers who visited Washington did not have an appointment with the Senator and she was not in her office on that day. We would appreciate it if the e-mails and negative comments about Senator Clinton would cease."

Case closed. Sadly, the rabid righties aren't the type to let the proverbial facts get in the way of a story.

 
SOON THERE WILL ONLY BE ONE    Recovering Liberal

From the forward:

"Gold Star Mothers is an organization made up of women who sons were killed in military combat during service in the United States armed forces. Recently a delegation of New York Gold Star Mothers made a trip to Washington, DC to discuss various concerns with their elected representatives. According to NewsMax.com there was only one politician in DC who refused to meet with these ladies. . .

. . . You got it! None other than the Queen herself, The Hildebeast, Hillary Clinton. She refused repeated requests to meet with the Gold Star Mothers."

It's a timely claim, in a way, since the right is outraged that she might be running for president. It's also completely false. Here's what the Gold Star Mothers themselves had to say about the "incident" on their official site:

"With regard to the NewsMax article concerning our organization, the American Gold Star Mothers, Inc., deeply regret the misunderstanding about Senator Hillary Clinton. The two mothers who visited Washington did not have an appointment with the Senator and she was not in her office on that day. We would appreciate it if the e-mails and negative comments about Senator Clinton would cease."

Case closed. Sadly, the rabid righties aren't the type to let the proverbial facts get in the way of a story.



William Donohue is a disease!

A picture named WilliamDonohue.jpg

I think I'm starting to suffer from a new form of mental illness curently under consideration to be entered in the DSM-IV: Severe Wingnut Psychosis: The sudden and uncontrollable impulse, and or urge to bash in my television set with a large, metal object due to the exposure of CNN, MSNBC, and FOX News.

Video-WMP

Video-QT

In a segment on Scarborough Country (where else) Donohue is angry and wants an apology. While defending the Catholic Church's stance on condoms in Africa...you watch!



Ann Coulter makes TIME

Magazine’s list of "the world’s 100 most influential people"

via DC Media Girl (reg. only)

She states: Simply unbelieveable

That about seals the deal. Everthing is infected.



More and More, Kids Say the Foulest Things

via WaPo : "The kids swear almost incessantly," said Horwich, who teaches at Guildford High School in Rockford, Ill. "They are so used to swearing and hearing it at home, and in the movies, and on TV, and in the music they listen to that they have become desensitized to it."...read on



Drudge Invents Story for DeLay

A picture named Drudge_Tshirt1.jpg

This is pathetic:

The “liberals” selling the shirt are actually…just one random guy named Christopher Goodwin. Christopher runs “Ye Olde Christopher Goodwin Art Shoppe,” an online store.

According to Alexa.com, Christopher Goodwin’s website is the 2,071,537th most visited site on the Internet; to put that in perspective (and to make clear Goodwin’s profound obscurity) consider that the homepage for Chicken of the Sea tuna is ranked 163,081.

In other words, Drudge made a concerted attempt to find absolutely anything to take the heat off Tom DeLay’s various corruption charges, and the very best he could come up with was a stupid t-shirt from “Ye Olde Christopher Goodwin Art Shoppe.” Lame.



Joe Lieberman and Zell Miller. What do they have in Common?

A picture named moveamericaforwardad.jpg

On Crossfire today, Barbara Comstock , FMR. JUSTICE DEPT. SPOKESWOMAN:

Comstock: Tom DeLay is one of the most effective leaders, which is why the Democrats have tried to make this a campaign issue. Now as you know from your friend Senator Zell Miller and Joe Lieberman, oftentimes people break in the party.

Video-WMP

It seems like everyone else knows it but Joe.

Eschaton: Joe & Zell, Pees in a Pod

Busy, Busy, Busy has more on the second picture!



Santorum and the "Culture of Cash"

John Baer nails "the man on dog" via Philly.com.

......And take his trip to Florida and his national TV appearance after visiting the hospice where Terry Schiavo was dying. A masterpiece of timing, an exceptional use of his time and a good example of how politics is played by the big boys. Make some news, do a little pandering, raise some money and, oh, yeah, comfort a suffering family. Wait, raise some money? Yep, that's what the trip was about.Maybe you thought it was about Santorum's deep commitment to the culture of life....

Total take, according to Santorum finance director Rob Bickhart, was about $250,000 (en route to an April 15 FEC filing expected to show the senator with close to $3 million already). So my hat's off.

Down and back on a corporate jet, grab a quarter-mill, get some national attention. This, my friends, is poetry in motion.

What's that you say? Seems a tad crass to cash in on a heartbroken family and get your mug on TV because you happen to be in the neighborhood lining your pockets?

Doesn't the culture of life outweigh the culture of cash.

And you thought he was there out of a moral conviction didn't you?