The Fundamentalist Right: an oxymoron

We’ve learned a lot from this election. We’ve learned that Jerry Springer airs on PBS in Oklahoma. We learned that we should post signs on the side of the highway when you cross the Mason/Dixon line that say, 'Caution: Minds Narrow’. We learned that we must never forget that there is a large section of the country where the terms “cousins once removed” and “coitus interruptus” are pretty much the same thing. We learned that “compassionate conservatives” are most conservative with their compassion. We learned that the reason they call it America’s Heartland is because clearly the brain is not there. But mostly we have learned that if we’re not extra special very careful, America is going to hang itself with it's Bible Belt.
I know that for the next four years we’ll have to get used to seeing the clock set back on many of the advances we’ve made over the last century. These changes will be accompanied by odd ironies and logic that just don’t make sense to those of us who live outside of the faith-based community.
And come 2008 Americans will ask each other, “Are you better off now than you were 400 years ago?”
The fundamentalists want to eliminate sex education in the schools. Abstinence is the answer. Ever notice most of these folks who preach abstinence as a way to temper appetites are 75 pounds overweight? Go to Disneyland just to be sure.
Masturbation is a sin and will be outlawed. Idle hands are the devil’s workshop. Masturbation is “self abuse”. Masturbation is “abuse” and boxing is a sport. I personally only once suffered a knockout, but I was in training.
They don't want teenagers to have condoms, in that "Silence of the Lambskins" campaign they’re running. Then they still try to blame teen sex on rock and roll music. Teenagers have sex because they're horny and because of peer pressure. If you're going to peg teen sex on rock and roll, why don't we just blame incest on Country and Western?
Regarding a woman’s right to choose, everyone is entitled to their beliefs; this is America. My belief happens to be that life begins when you start minding your own fucking business. I have a theory that the religious right wants to haul all of the coat hangers out of the closet to make room for the gays they want to shove back in. Remember, class: "Sodomy is evil". Unless it's a Glow Stick up an Iraqi prisoner's ass, lighting the way for Freedom across the globe. Then it's a Toby Keith song.
And, finally, they refuse to believe in evolution. That part I can understand, actually. Because if you subscribe to the theory of evolution, well then, there's a tacit obligation to PARTICIPATE in evolution. For some people that's a little too much pressure. Many of the righteous can’t recognize that Faith is a way to avoid responsibility. It’s always the people with recessive genes who don't believe in evolution. “I believe in Creationism,” they’ll say. Really? I believe in critical thought. But then, my reading matter is a little more up to date than yours.

Mike Dugan-C&L

Wow. Just wow.

KOCO 5 (Oklahoma City):

An Oklahoma church canceled a controversial gun giveaway for teenagers at a weekend youth conference.

Windsor Hills Baptist had planned to give away a semiautomatic assault rifle until one of the event's organizers was unable to attend.

The church's youth pastor, Bob Ross, said it's a way of trying to encourage young people to attend the event. The church expected hundreds of teenagers from as far away as Canada.

"We have 21 hours of preaching and teaching throughout the week," Ross said.[..]

"I don't want people thinking ‘My goodness, we're putting a weapon in the hand of somebody that doesn't respect it who are then going to go out and kill,'" said Ross. "That's not at all what we're trying to do."

Ross said the conference isn't all about guns, but rather about teens finding faith.

What Would Jesus Do? Give a semi-automatic weapon to a teenager, naturally. Makes perfect sense to me. (/sarcasm)

No, it's not the latest ranting of Grampa McSame, but a news item my local San Francisco news affiliate carried. The context was a new way to combat the problem of loitering in high crime areas. The answer is a technology that struck me: "The Mosquito." an ultrasonic device that emits a high-pitched noise that only teenagers can hear.

Marketed under the banner "Kids Be Gone," the device emits a high-frequency modulated tone that has been likened to fingernails on a blackboard or a mosquito buzzing in the ear. Because the ability to hear higher frequencies fades with age, the Mosquito affects only people younger than about age 25. Also, according to the makers and various media reports, the sound does not annoy young children or dogs, only people in the 13 to 25 age bracket.[..]

A website focused on the Mosquito — www.kidsbegone.com — says studies have shown the device is safe and does not damage teenagers' hearing. The effective range is about 50 feet, according to the website.

In a sneaky twist, the same technology is available as a cellphone ring tone, alerting teens to calls that teachers, parents and other adults can't hear. The Kids Be Gone website has a link to the high frequency ring tone. In a test at The Courant, a 22-year-old said he could clearly hear the tone, while several staffers over age 25 heard nothing.

The technology rests with little tiny hair perceptors in our ears that usually die off by the age of 25. Although the manufacturers say that no permanent damage is done from The Mosquito, I'm a little wary of such assurances. The technology has been used in the UK and is now the subject of a protest for its indiscriminate use. (YouTube)

The WaPo reported the other day that at least 14 states have “either notified the federal government that they will no longer be requesting [sex education] funds or are not expected to apply,” because the Bush administration mandates abstinence-only lessons in public schools receiving the funding.

“We’re concerned about this,” said Stan Koutstaal of the Department of Health and Human Services, which runs the program. “My greatest concern about states dropping out is that these are valuable services and programs. It’s the youths in these states who are missing out.”

Actually, that’s backwards. The youths are better off with actual sex-ed.

Teenagers who have had formal sex education are far more likely to put off having sex, contradicting earlier studies on the effectiveness of such programs, U.S. researchers said on Wednesday.

They found teenage boys who had sex education in school were 71 percent less likely to have intercourse before age 15, and teen girls who had sex education were 59 percent less likely to have sex before age 15.

Sex education also increased the likelihood that teen boys would use contraceptives the first time they had sex, according to the study by researchers at the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, which was published in the Journal of Adolescent Health.

Whaddaya know; giving young people reliable, accurate information about sexual health leads to safer, more responsible behavior. Maybe someone get pass word along to the Bush administration.

Those who are concerned with reality probably didn’t need more evidence that abstinence-only programs don't work, but we have some anyway. The nonpartisan National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy released the results of its latest research project this week.

“At present there does not exist any strong evidence that any abstinence program delays the initiation of sex, hastens the return to abstinence or reduces the number of sexual partners” among teenagers, the study concluded. […]

The study found that while abstinence-only efforts appear to have little positive impact, more comprehensive sex education programs were having “positive outcomes” including teenagers “delaying the initiation of sex, reducing the frequency of sex, reducing the number of sexual partners and increasing condom or contraceptive use.”

“Two-thirds of the 48 comprehensive programs that supported both abstinence and the use of condoms and contraceptives for sexually active teens had positive behavior effect,” said the report.

You mean, simply telling teenagers not to have sex doesn’t work? And quality, comprehensive education does? And the Bush administration insists on supporting the prior while rejecting the latter? You don’t say.

...except in a video game for Jesus.

NY Times: (h/t Rick)

First the percussive sounds of sniper fire and the thrill of the kill. Then the gospel of peace.

Across the country, hundreds of ministers and pastors desperate to reach young congregants have drawn concern and criticism through their use of an unusual recruiting tool: the immersive and violent video game Halo.[..]

Those buying it must be 17 years old, given it is rated M for mature audiences. But that has not prevented leaders at churches and youth centers across Protestant denominations, including evangelical churches that have cautioned against violent entertainment, from holding heavily attended Halo nights and stocking their centers with multiple game consoles so dozens of teenagers can flock around big-screen televisions and shoot it out.

The alliance of popular culture and evangelism is challenging churches much as bingo games did in the 1960s. And the question fits into a rich debate about how far churches should go to reach young people.

Far from being defensive, church leaders who support Halo - despite its "thou shalt kill" credo - celebrate it as a modern and sometimes singularly effective tool. It is crucial, they say, to reach the elusive audience of boys and young men.

Oh, I don't know....one would think the line has been crossed when one is encouraging kids to kill (even if only virtually) to bring them to Jesus. This is a whole new take on "WWJD" that sadly reflects more on our society than religion.

Chicago Tribune:

There is no single leader. There is no agreed schedule. Organizers aren't even certain where everyone is supposed to gather, let alone use the restroom. The only thing that is known for sure is that thousands of protesters are boarding buses at churches, colleges and community centers across the country this week, headed for this tiny dot on the map of central Louisiana.[..]

Yet this will be a civil rights protest literally conjured out of the ether of cyberspace, of a type that has never happened before in America-a collective national mass action grown from a grassroots word-of-mouth movement spread via Internet blogs, e-mails, message boards and talk radio.

Jackson, Sharpton and other big-name civil rights figures, far from leading this movement, have had to scramble to catch up. So, too, has the national media, which has only recently noticed a story that has been agitating many black Americans for months.

As formidable as it is amorphous, this new African-American blogosphere, which scarcely even existed a year ago, now comprises hundreds of interlinked blogs and tens of the thousands of followers who within a matter of a few weeks collected 220,000 petition signatures-and more than $130,000 in donations for legal fees-in support of six black Jena teenagers who are being prosecuted on felony battery charges for beating a white student.

Color of Change is certainly one of the blogs leading the protests. They have a petition you can sign to support the Jena6

No, not your attitude. She really thinks you need to bathe more. I'm completely serious.

AFL-CIOblog:

High school gym, where listening to lectures on personal hygiene was part of the package. It's one thing for a gym teacher to tell a bunch of sweaty teenagers to hit the showers. But it's something quite different when the U.S. secretary of labor tells Parade magazine-a national weekly read by millions of Americans-the nation's workers need a bath if they want to keep their jobs.[..]

Chao told Parade it's not just the low-cost of foreign labor that is enticing many U.S. employers to ship jobs overseas-overseas workers dress and bathe better.

Beyond the cheaper cost of labor, U.S. employers say that many workers abroad simply have a better attitude toward work. "American employees must be punctual, dress appropriately and have good personal hygiene," says Chao.

Alex Bastani, AFGE Local 12 president,[..] noted that in 2004, Chao's Labor Department changed the rules on who qualifies for overtime pay and millions of workers were robbed of their rights to overtime pay. Just this year, she tried to outsource some 250 Department of Labor jobs but was unsuccessful.

Members of the AFGE Local 12 chapter will be at Department of Labor headquarters passing out the above-pictured bars of soap. And I would be remiss to not remind you who is Chao's (presumably clean-smelling) husband...

The American front on the "War on Terror" has taken some interesting turns this week, especially if you're the trainwreck that is Debbie Schlussel, who you may remember sees Muslim terrorists around every corner.

Knowing that to most of us, a grasp on reality is important, she invokes Godwin's law over being called out over her incredibly ignorant and blind bigotry. Yet, as petrified as Debbie is over a couple of teenagers with cherry bombs, she remains blithely indifferent to the advocation of domestic terrorism by the leader of the Southern Baptist Convention or worse, an actual BOMB left at a women's clinic in Austin. Obviously, for Debbie, the amount of melanin she suspects is in your skin dictates whether it's considered terrorist activities.

Sadly, Cliff Schecter suspects that Michael Chertoff may actually be getting his Homeland Security ideas from the same shallow pool as Schlussel. Yes, it's that disturbing...

"A Bush in 30 Seconds video, #76 of the 1500 or so in that competition. It shows teenagers blindly accepting their fate under our current hypocritical and deadly regime"