Alabama has moved to deny undocumented children a chance to participate in our state's civic religion, i.e. football, but some things are still more sacred than our state's responsibility to shun brown people. Like, say, the legislature's duty to save their souls before we deport them. See how that works?

Remember Alabama's State Senator Scott Beason, who wants to "empty the clip on illegal immigration"? Watch as he struggles to argue against modifying a provision that would put church deacons in prison for giving the undocumented a ride to church. Really! Much more after the jump...

Going by the Orwellian title "Alabama Taxpayer and Citizen Protection Act," SB 256 is marginally worse than the bill crafted by House Majority Leader Mickey Hammon. But rather than fight as House Democrats have, Senate Dems have chosen to improve legislation, not oppose it outright. In the process, the cognitive dissonance behind omnibus immigration legislation has been laid bare. The Senate minority has fought on moral high ground and rhetoric -- exactly what you are supposed to see in an "upper chamber," or so I'm told. But I'd prefer wholesale resistance to piecemeal.

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Target Stores has an idea for you: How about being an "Illegal Alien"?

That's right, complete with Area 51 alien rubber mask orange prison jumpsuit emblazoned with the words "Illegal Alien" and your very own green card, you can show your neighbors your grasp on the issues of the day and get candy too!

As one of the reviews for the costume reads:

The costume is a sick sign of the times we are living in this country where those who are not "people like us" might as well be from another planet and are considered less than human. I am surprised Target would promote such a mentality.

Stay classy, Target.

To fully appreciate the ideology of large parts of the Republican Party, one needs to look past Capitol Hill and consider what state GOP officials are up to. Take Utah, for example.

Several top Republican officials in Utah — including the lieutenant governor, the state attorney general, and U.S. Rep. Chris Cannon — gathered over the weekend for an annual GOP county convention where attendees debated a resolution on immigration. The debate didn't go well.

Don Larsen, chairman of legislative District 65 for the Utah County Republican Party, had submitted a resolution warning that Satan’s minions want to eliminate national borders and do away with sovereignty.

In a speech at the convention, Larsen told those gathered that illegal immigrants “hate American people” and “are determined to destroy this country, and there is nothing they won’t do.”

Illegal aliens are in control of the media, and working in tandem with Democrats, are trying to “destroy Christian America” and replace it with “a godless new world order — and that is not extremism, that is fact,” Larsen said. […]

Republican officials then allowed speakers to defend and refute the resolution. One speaker, who was identified as “Joe,” said illegal immigrants were Marxist and under the influence of the devil. Another, who declined to give her name to the Daily Herald, said illegal immigrants should not be allowed because “they are not going to become Republicans….”

Wow.

He's baaaack with another sick,vile ad and attacks Brad Miller viciously.

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"You needed that job," an announcer says. "And you were the best qualified. But they gave it to an illegal alien — so they could pay him under the table. … These illegals pay no taxes, but take our jobs and our government handouts. Then spit in our face. And burn our flag. Well, Vernon Robinson has had enough!"

(h/t Mike for the video)

"The College Republicans at Penn State University wanted to enter the debate about the nation's borders by playing a "Catch an Illegal Immigrant Game." People would be invited to "catch" group members wearing orange shirts symbolizing illegal aliens....read on"

(h/t Joel)

Saturday Blooper

Conway: "We have 8 1/2 illegal aliens in the country today"

(hat tip Brian for the video)

Download | play -WMP

Download | play -QT

Conway: "Immigration and spending are the biggest threats to the Republican majority, because those are the two low grade fears that can spike up and really hurt if they don't address them in a meaningful way..."

New Poll Finds Most Americans 'Scared to Death' of Activist Judges

According to a recent poll, the majority of Americans fear activist judges more than any other single threat, including toxic mold, illegal aliens, alien abduction or North Korea. The poll also found that most Americans feel far more threatened by activist judges today than they did this time last year.

A citizens' group moves to ban activist judges from purchasing homes in one neighborhood

Bush Vows Revenge Against Sith...bashes fictitious foes in nationally televised address

Amid reports that the new “Star Wars” film contains not-so-subtle anti-Bush messages, President George W. Bush today took to the national airwaves to vow revenge against the Sith.

Speaking from the Oval Office in the nationally televised address, the president portrayed the U.S.’s conflict with the Sith as a classic struggle between good and evil.

“Now is the time for all of the nations of the world to ask themselves,” the president said. “Are you with us, or are you with the Sith?”

At a time when the U.S. military is considering dozens of base closings across the country, the president’s decision to declare a new war, especially one that would presumably take place in outer space, took many by surprise.

But according to Ret. General Crandall Wheatley of the University of Minnesota’s Defense Institute, there may be a method to the president’s madness: “At a time when the U.S. military is stretched thin, it may make sense to declare war against a fictitious enemy.”

Furthermore, declaring war against an enemy that it not really there is not completely without precedent in U.S. history, Gen. Wheatley says: “There was the invasion of Iraq, for example.”

But in the U.S. Senate, even some of the president’s Republican colleagues seemed cool to his latest crusade, with one Senate aide offering this terse summary of the Mr. Bush’s second term in office: “Soft on illegal aliens, tough on aliens.”

Elsewhere, Britney Spears and Kevin Federline shocked the world with their new reality series Tuesday night by proving that they could successfully operate a video camera.

via essays & effluvia: The Deadwood F-Bomb Counter