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Twitter Scoffs After Trump Tries To Scare Suburban Women With Threat Of Cory Booker

In reaction to this absurd "threat," America's suburbs collectively overnight their house keys to Cory Booker.

By Aliza Worthington
09/01/20 12:28 pm

In Monday night's unhinged interview with Laura Ingraham, Donald Trump tried to scare suburban women by saying not only might people poorer than they are come to live in their neighborhoods, but New Jersey's Senator Cory Booker might head up the effort! Heaven forfend!

To be fair, what Trump really said was "serberbs" so maybe there are such places wherein folks might be scared of a large vegan former college football player, famous for his bear hugs and thousand-watt smile, and also famous for shoveling his neighbor's walks, oh, and rescuing constituents from a burning building. You know, because he's *whispers* B-L-A-C-K.

But here, in America, we have things called "SUBURBS," Donald, and if Twitter is any indication, people there aren't scared of Sen. Booker.

Now, I always call foul when people objectify female professionals while they're trying to do their jobs (and in other situations, too.) So, I will look the other way while middle-school me enters my body and puts the following tweets into this post to show other reasons suburban women are not frightened of Sen. Booker.

And for the absolutely most scary thing that might happen if Cory Booker came to your neighborhood, I present you with the best string of tweets ever:

So, please, Donald. Threaten us.
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