Twizzler Trump, the nominally stupidest Trump —and the competition is fierce— is also the writer of some seriously stupid fanfic:

Eric Trump: Putin was in with the KGB. He can read people and he could tell that Donald Trump was a very strong person.

Besides the actual fact that Putin was invading Ukraine while Hair Füror was in office (Hello, Crimea!) , and even a hawk like John ‘Bomb ’em all’ Bolton thought that Vlad was waiting for Trump II: Electric Bumbling-oo to destroy NATO for him. But you know, Twizzler knows that daddy can be cruel and gets what he wants at the expense of innocent naifs like himself, the First Shady, and of course, Junior Mints/Snorty McCokespoon.

Just as a refresher for Twizz, let’s review what strongman Il Douche was already doing to make Pooty-Poot wee himself:

• leaked classified information to Russia from the Oval Office itself
• sided with Putin over his own intelligence agencies re: Russia’s 2016 Goat Rodeo election meddling
• said it was Ukraine who meddled in the 2016 Goat Rodeo
• suggested collaborating on a “cybersecurity unit” to combat “election hacking” with Pooty
• excused killings by Putin, saying the U.S. is just as bad
• pulled out of Syria so Russia could have free reign to influence that cluster-eff
• argued to expanded G7 to include Russia, after it had been kicked out of for annexing Crimea

So yeah, Twizzler. Dead-eyed mass-killer psychopath war criminal Putin was terrified of this guy:

Lord Damp Nut says he could have gone pro.

Republished with permission from Mock, Paper, Scissors.