The problem, of course, is not that Friedman desires to talk about China, Jobs, or the internet, these are important topics! Unfortunately, Friedman himself is the Dane Cook of prophecy—overrated, overearnest, and having been exposed as fraudulent, in rapid decline. Dammit, we can do better.

Oh, gosh. If you're looking for articles backing up the idea that Thomas Friedman sucks massive eggs, the internet is a grand smorgasbord indeed. But this, this and this are fine places to start.

No disrespect intended to bloggers by comparing them to Friedman, in many ways Friedman is the anti-blogger—well-financed, entrenched in Washington, and being printed on actual paper. Unfortunately, his legacy may be a generation of writers who think his "Lonely Planet That Is Hot And Crowded" travel-guide approach to punditry might actually be a good idea. Writers: just because you use some form of transportation that is not a car does not mean you have sufficient content for a column, or special insight into the internet age.

So shine on, you crazy mustache. Just don't do it where I have to see it, it makes me want to throw up.