Well, here's your next Speaker of the House, America: Cryin' John Boehner, who almost turned on the waterworks during his speech after it became clear last night that Republicans are going to win back the House. Boehner -- who, as Keith Olbermann pointed out after his speech, was overpainted himself as just a man of the people rather than on old-time pol -- complained about how "out of touch" Washington has become. Pot, meet kettle.

Get ready for endless investigations, gridlock and craziness that's going to make us long for the days of Bill Clinton in comparison. Ugh.