The President of the United Damn States of America was asked to record the Gettysburg Address. They asked him to read what is called The Nicolay copy – which is believed to be the first draft – and is the one preserved at the Library of Congress.

He read it.

They reacted.

The words “under God” are not in the Nicolay version. You know, the one preserved in at the Library of Congress.

Good Lord, can’t these people take up knitting or something?

Buck Pochek once picketed the beauty salon because he claimed Juanita Jean left “under God” out of Take Me Out To the Ballgame.

Same deal.