April 20, 2008 11:30 PM
Open Thread/Caption This Photo
and the offering from Tengrain: "I think the Rapture Meter just went off the scales...." I also love any caption that has Lynne saying "I now pronounce you..."
Open thread below...
About Bluegal aka Fran
Executive Producer of The Professional Left Podcast. On staff at Crooks and Liars since 2007. Master's degree from Harvard. Happy wife of Driftglass. Mother of three geniuses. Obsessive knitter. Blogs at http://bgalrstate.blogspot.com. .
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Cheney: "Your holiness, ve have vays..." The Pope interrupts, "Vat?! Achtung, zat is vat i vas going to zay...ja, ve shood go hunting zometimes. Ve have much to discuss about your afterlife."
Are your hands burning too?
_
Please Master Dick, Don't Take Me Hunting.
Ya, and ve von't get much time as you vill not be nearby for too long.
"About that hell thing...are you sure?"
AN OPEN LETTER TO VICE PRESIDENT & MRS. CHENEY
if a sparrow cannot fall to the ground without his notice, is it probable that an empire can get exposed as an illegal, unconstitutional racket without his aid?
"you fuck'em, i'll kill'em, she can bitch at us for doing it on her new carpet!
Two of the Scariest people alive.
Pope Benedict says "Hello Satan, I can't believe its taken us this long to have a face-to-face."
Now I want a clean fight so shake hands and come out swinging.
You're lucky I'm not really a man of God, otherwise I'd have the Swiss Guard all over your ass.
Trust me, Your Eminence, this exorcism thingy won't work on him.
Your Holiness I so admire the work your organization did in the late 1400s...
The last surviving frame before the matter/anti-matter contact lead to instant annihilation of the space time continuum.
w and cheney are in legacy changing mode.
Catholics don't believe in rapture.
Your holiness, Lynne has asked me to break my covenant with Beezelbub....
Cheney says: Hey didn't I shoot you in the face once. I never forget a target.
"I can get you a great deal on some new gold fixtures for that little boys retreat you're putting in at Vatican City from my KBR buddies. Lynne's real good at interior design too."
Dick, Dick! Ask him if he's read any good books lately...
Where is that sulfer odor coming from?
~just nod and smile~ god this guy gives me the creeps, he'll make a nice demon when I am in charge of hell!!! whue whue wue!
+oh my gott! this phoney bastard should be the vorst of it... lass uns get it over with! +just nod and smile+... +oh my soul-!
Is it me or does the Pope sound like Dr. Strangelove?
Just sayin'...
Lynne says: OK which one of you guys cut the cheese?
Why yes I do use Dawn detergent. Why do you ask?
Cheney: You will forgive me, asshole or I'll beat you to death with your girly red shoes.
"forgive me father, for who I am next about to shoot"
Ebony and Ivory.
No no NO, your Holiness! You MUST put your right hand in, THEN, out, THEN in again before you shake it all about! You are SO not going to make it past the first round of Dancing With the Stars...
Here Benedict, take this and read it. It's my favorite book--The Book Of The Law.
"God and Satan reconcile."
I was just kidding when I said " pull my finger".
"how much are plenary indulgences when bought wholesale?"
No. It's my ring. You can't have it.
I'll bet the Pope washed his hands with gasoline to get that burning smell off his skin.
Makes you wonder....ex-Nazi, current fascist. Hmmm.....marriage made in heaven.
"You're holiness, I'm going to need to borrow your glass golfcart for the back nine at the Mosul Country Club"
"It's usually customary to call me Mr. Vice President but, just to make you feel at home your Eminence, you can call me "Mein Fuehrer".
any one see the candidates on WWE RAW!?!?
An L.A. shooting kills a guy in a wheelchair. We're running out of skilled labor. Ruben Salazar gets a stamp.
Hawking believes in aliens.
A Colorado legislator doesn't care about brown people.
ever notice how much ed rendell looks like a stooge from dick tracy?
god, i hope he gets caught rigging pennsylvania for hillary.
spitzer and rendell in the same year? priceless...
Teh Emperor of Penquins meets Teh Penquin Emperor and his chick, Teh Cackler:
"Your confessional scheme has always been an inspiration to me, yer holiness, quack!"
"Ja, and I luff vat yoof done viss your phones here, and danka for carrying on our greatest traditions at Guantanamo. You've rendered many unto God, my son."
"Cackle cackle cackle cackle."
"Shuthut upp bbitch - jinx!!"
"Your Holiness, our daughter's got this girlfriend we're not really fond of..."
Extra bags on planes are no longer free. The White House doesn't want people to know about the criminals who visit
the place.
Secret Nazi handshake.
Well... your hands are smaller than Lynne's but if you put them where I show you, I think you'll understand why "You ain't got Dick" is a joke.
The master plan is working out stupendously, Adolph would be so proud!
"You can take my word Dick - as one Nazi to another. And Lynn - loved the lesbo love story. Have you sold the film rights yet.
*
Hey. Ive got an outfit just like that in my man-sized safe.
"Can you take Lynne and Condi out shoe shopping?"
Your Holiness, Satan. Satan, his holiness.
"Vice-Fuhrer Darth Fudd turning the Pope to stone...."
Crux sancta sit mihi lux / Non draco sit mihi dux
Vade retro satana / Nunquam suade mihi vana
Sunt mala quae libas / Ipse venena bibas
You will go to hell but I have some good news, you'll have Bill Maher there to entertain you for eternity.
"Ooh! Maybe I should branch off from lesbo porn novels! No, I couldn't! Tee-hee!"
It would take too long for Cheney to confess all his sins.
"Yeah, I know our track record on arming our own troops' vehicles is not great, but we can really fortify the Popemobile against IEDs for you. You'll be converting lots of souls in Iraq and Iran soon."
So Lucifer said to the Pope....
Gargoyles of Mass Distraction summit
Good move choosing "Benedict." Trust me, people take liberties with "Richard."
I have met the demon beelzebub and looked him in the eye. He is beyond redemption, just like Uncle Adolf, his last incarnation.
The Obama rally from earlier in on C-Span. He is knocking it out of the park.
"So, do you get to tell your boss what to say too?"
Is invading a country and killing hundreds of thousands of innocents a venal or a cardinal sin you ask? Good question. I'll have to pontificate on that.
Hmm Chimpy's 'wet tshirt' intern contest, hes old enough to be her sugar grandaddy.
Hes getting a sneaky quick feel of her wet boob in this pic !!!!
Wanky, Skanky 'n Cranky
Can the Pope carry out an exorcism?
ferrofluid @ 64:
I wonder if shes even 18 and legal to grope going by this pic, do we have a 'boobgate' scandal coming up in the MSM ?
"Is waterboarding really torture if you bless the water beforehand?"
Ah Mr President. It's good to meet you at last.
Where's your pet monkey?
Can the Pope grant special dispensation to war criminals, crooks liars?
Leslie [Bitter Elitist Hussein] @ 70:
they have done so in the past
Cheney: Pope Benedict, Lynne and I were wondering if you'd come hunting with us this weekend?
in the butt!
Peter G @ 69:
"hes off groping underage girls in wet tshirts" (see my post above)
Mr. Cheney, God has told me that you won't be visiting him and that he watches your wife with the pool-boy.
hitler youth is where they sent kids to be brainwashed. german kids were not nazis. the pope was never a nazi and isn't a nazi. get a clue.
ferrofluid @ 64:
I think the one girl in the upper left is flipping Prez. Fuckwit the bird, a-la Obama...
"Why do we stay? I have no reason beyond a few pupils who would miss me briefly, and your life would be infinitely better away from him. Let us go away together, away from the anger and imperatives of men. We shall find ourselves a secluded bower where they dare not venture. There will be only the two of us, and we shall linger through long afternoons of sweet retirement. In the evenings I shall read to you while you work your cross-stitch in the firelight. And then we shall go to bed, our bed, my dearest girl. . . ."
L. Cheney (thinks) 'hmmm, touching and no visible smoke yet'
"Now you can shoot lightning bolts from your hands, too."
Cheney to Pope....I'll show you my hot link if you show me your wienerschnitzel
Pope vs. anti-Pope
Barrett D @ 76:
Hitler Youth was a paramilitary scouting style movement, weekly meetings in church halls and usual scout type stuff, plus Nazi social racial indoctrination.
Two there are. No more, no less. One master and one apprentice.
Not a caption, and I know C&L isn't endorsing anyone, but this is some serious stuff that merits attention:
ABC News -- Clinton on Iran Attack: 'Obliterate Them'
http://www.americablog.com/2008/04/abc-news-clinton-on-iran-attack.html
I believe it was Cheney who said we are the "new Rome".
The Death Star is almost complete, master...
Excellent Lord Cheney Vader, you have done well my apprentice.
Now I will deal with the senate.
L.A. Confidential @ 86:
When does the orgy start?
Barrett D @ 76:
I don't care.
"And then he threw away his right crutch..."
Be clear, the comment [at 90] is NOT me. It's from YouTube.
Peter G @ 88:
It's already started. We are the feast.
Satan leaves his undisclosed location to shake hands with the Pope.
two dicks one cup.
A little Rumsfeld, Saddam deja vu...
Ron @ 92:
Oh dear. I'm well past my best before date. And the salmon mousse doesn't look to fresh either.
Welcome your Holiness. Come let me show you my dungeon..er office.
Bless me father for I have sinned, it has been (5) Vietnam draft deferments http://www.rense.com/general52/chenn.htm (4) heart attacks, (1) quadruple bypass surgery, (2) artery-clearing angioplasties & an operation to implant a defibrillator since my last confession http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8T64LPO0&show_article=1 please have pity on my sorry ass soul!
OK, TMI ;)
Peter G @ 96:
I hope they all get sick and suffer off the feeding of us. They shouldn't die right away but suffer for a long time.
His Holiness the Pope meets his Assholiness the Dope
Cheney: "Your eminence, Satan sends his regards and wants you to know I'm doing everything I can to speed up armaggeddon and that whole rapture deal."
Pope: "F*CK OFF!"
Cheney: "Hey, that's my line asshole!" "What's the matter, you wake up on the wrong side of the alter boy this morning?"
Lynn: "SON-OF-A-BITHCH! See, this is why you don't have more friends. Lucifer and big business are the only entities that you get along with!"
Cheney: "Open your peter beaters one more time and I'm gonna have another huntin accident."
Darth Sidious meet Senator Palpatine. as introduced by Jar Jar Binks!
Pope palms prick admired by no nun.
"Repentant Hitler Youth greets unrepentant Brown Shirts."
Nice yamulke.
Won't the real Palpatine please stand up?
dick, "does this come in pink?"
Proud2bHumble Hus(in)sein @ 103:
Sounds like headline material P2B.
Your holiness, Take it from a real Dick. Require the altar boys to submit to binding arbitration like we did our employees at Halliburton and they can't sue. You're set up forever! hahahahahahahaha!
I knew Hitler! Mr Cheney... you're no Hitler!
I think we have seen this picture before:
http://www.remnantofgod.org/NaziRCC/hitler-rcc4.bmp
"This seemed odd to me. For the pope's arrival ceremony at the White House tomorrow, they're going to give him a 21-gun salute. Now, really, isn't there a better welcome for the Apostle of Peace than a show of firearms? I mean, whose idea was that? Dick Cheney's?" --Jay Leno
"Actually, one really embarrassing moment, you see this on the news? When the pope blessed the crowd with holy water? Well, some of it splashed on Dick Cheney, burned his skin." --Jay Leno
"President Bush also told the pope that he has prayed every single day since he became president. Hey, since Bush became president, we've all prayed every single day." --Jay Leno
"Did you hear what President Bush said to the pope after his speech today? This is an exact quote. I'm not changing it. He said, 'Awesome speech, your Holiness.' That's what he said to the pope. See, he didn't want to say 'dude,' because it was a formal affair." --Jay Leno
"The White House held a big dinner tonight honoring the pope, but the pope chose not to attend. He didn't attend the dinner. I think President Bush was a little hurt. In fact, he said today, 'You know, after the trouble we went through to prepare a kosher meal." --Jay Leno
"Anyway, when the pope arrived at the White House, he was given a 21-gun salute. That's got to make Barack Obama a little uncomfortable. Guns and religion, you know, that kind of thing. Get a little bitter. I don't know about that." --Jay Leno
The prince of peace and the prince of darkness send their representatives to meet.
"I now pronounce you, Benny, Dicked."
exGOP @ 113:
Hey, that's got to be the best analogy of all.
"BREAKING NEWS: GOD AND SATAN DECLARE TRUCE"
Peter G @ 108:
Hi PtG :) Hard to come up with anything funny for this asskiss of evil pic.
BTW, ad copy pays the little bills now, and hopefully a graphic novel ala William Gibson meets Frank Miller will pay some bigger ones later. OCD perfectionism delays abound...
Jesse! @ 116:
Won't matter as long as Bush and Cheney are in office. They are on their own mission.
There's not just an income disparity, but a health disparity.
Looks like Darth Vader and the Emperor finally got together.
Proud2bHumble Hus(in)sein @ 117:
I agree. It's surprisingly difficult to come up with good copy for this pic. Like trying to write a funny caption for a picture of a car accident.
Finally watched Mclaughlin group and all I have to say what a waste of time they were talkng about the obama san francisco meeting where he talked about the embittered working class - I have a question why doesn't the majority of americans vote could it be that they see the system for what it is nothing more than a shell game that only the favored get the fruits of this country and they get left holding the bag how many times have you heard from your rep has he come to your house and heard what you have to say or even a town meeting that there are open questions?- as for the empty talking heads on the screen the closest they have gotten to the working middle class is giving a dollar to one and asking for change
Are you sure we weren't supposed to caption that advert below the Pope's picture instead? You know, the one with the woman's artificial legs bent up behind her?
I'm even more concerned about the earlier post about the Bush's and Cheney's with the Moonies.
Oh darn. The ad changed.
great I'm caught in the middle of an asshole sandwhich.
Cult-turd leaders hag leaning settle for holding hands.
I'd love to hear more about the inquisition father.
Holy seesaw shit sandwich.
But your hollyness the insurgency was in its last throws & we were seen as liberators & Iraq did help perpetrate 911 & they had yellow cake & WMD. Now go fuck yourself
So then Dick, you take both their hands like so..and guide them to Mr Winky .
"Your Holiness, what would Jesus do?"
"He vould tell you to go fuck yourself."
checking out now. GNA
FreshCliches @ 132:
He would have approved if he knew about the yellow cake, mushrooms and it was just going to be a party celebrating Iraqi freedom.
"Would you like to go hunting with me this weekend?"
No, this is not what Lucky Pierre means.
"Do you know where's the best place to seek asylum in say, January?"
.
"I'd invite you to my place, but it's a wrecktory."
.
"That's ok, Ratzo. Lynn's a little too un-convent-ional for that anyway. She likes the idea, but she's afraid she'd actually get nun at V-city."
Peter G @ 84:
And they have nasty, nasty sex.
GNA
Hittin’ the road, Jack,”and I ain’t comin’ back no more no more no more no more”…
“Last word, freak.” - Melvin Udall
out
;-}
Dick: Go f*ck yourself
Benny: F*ck your mother
Lynn: Leave his mama out of this, and I'll leave this (grabs crotch) out of yours.
* "For an exorcism this BIG -- who ya gonna' call?"
* "The Pope thanks VP Cheney for his selfless efforts at removing Saddam and bringing peace and stability to the Middle East"
Proud2bHumble Hus(in)sein @ 139:
Good night P2b.
"I now pronounce you: Nazi and Nazi and Nazi."
12000 Veteran Suicide attempts per year...
"..an epidemic of suicide among veterans."
"Brother Maynard bring forth the holy hand grenade!"
You bring the booze and I'll bring the boys
mcnote5150 @ 110:
Good.
cupid @ 145:
Slightly better.
"Cheney uses Halliburton profits to purchase Vatican in foreclosure deal"
"I'm a Nazi, She's a Nazi
He's a Nazi too!"
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