August 7, 2016

A NOTE TO COMMENTERS: Yes, that video above is a teaser trailer for the comedy "Nine Lives" and not the trailer to "Hillary's America." I know that.

I am posting the teaser trailer for "Nine Lives" instead, for two very important reasons.

One: I would never subject Crooks and Liars readers to a clip from any Dinesh d'Sousa movie. (Seriously if you are a masochist you can look up "Hillary's America" on YouTube yourself, and likely already have.)

Two: That Daddy's weekend visitation feature "Nine Lives" scored three points higher than "Hillary's America" on the Rotten Tomatoes "Tomatometer." So let that sink in.

nine_lives_vs_hillarys_america.jpg

Notice the "%" sign. That's right, 'Hillary's America' got four out of a hundred on the meter.

Our friends at Mock, Paper Scissors call Dinesh "D'vorce D'spousa" because he was caught with a hottie not his wifey at a conservative conference. But wait, there's more, via Right Wing Watch:

D’Souza is a questionable icon for so-called traditional values. He resigned as president of King’s College in 2012 after a scandal over his traveling with, and calling himself engaged to, a woman while he was still married to his first wife. When called out on his behavior by a conservative reporter, D’Souza apparently lied about having filed for divorce, said he had “done nothing wrong” and proclaimed that he was sure that the woman with whom he was having an affair was “the one for me.” D’Souza pleaded guilty in 2014 to criminal campaign finance law violations in which he reportedly used both his then-wife and then-mistress as straw donors to a friend’s political campaign. Since then he has consistently portrayed himself as the victim of a political vendetta.

He's also known for his books. My favorite title ever (eat your heart out, Hugh Hewitt) is from his 2007 book “The Enemy At Home: The Cultural Left and Its Responsibility for 9/11.” Unfortunately, the audio book isn't read by the author, or I would use "listening to it on headphones" with my teens as a punishment.

And his movie got a 4%. Rotten Tomatoes does appreciate movies that are so bad they're good. (Patrick Swayze's "Road House" got 39% for instance, because it's worth watching for its bad-ness.

"Hillary's America" is just bad. And not because it's conservative. New Republic gives us four moments from the film:

Jonah Goldberg being trotted out to give a tutorial about why progressivism is the same as fascism is the same as communism.

D’Souza giving a fist bump goodbye to the guard at the halfway house from which he’s been released.

A ghost KKK guy riding a ghost horse flying out of the White House while Woodrow Wilson is watching Birth of a Nation.

Teenage Hillary Clinton portrayed as if she were Tracy Flick if Tracy Flick liked to murder small animals.

And it has in common with Donald Trump, that many are asking, "Can it be as bad as all that?" Check out these reviews.

"Doesn't even qualify as effectively executed propaganda." - Michael Rechtshaffen,
Los Angeles Times

"D'Souza lets scenes drag, jumping through history in ways that quash any sense of discovery and creating an overall sense of boredom." - Alan Zilberman,
Washington Post

"A series of conspiratorial talking points familiar to Breitbart-oriented readers, but reshuffled in a new, startlingly illogical order." - Vadim Rizov, AV Club

"If your conservative uncle's forwarded emails were a movie, they would be Hillary's America: The Secret History of the Democratic Party, a dull grab-bag of stale talking points and wildly revisionist history." - Sean P. Means, Salt Lake Tribune

"When it comes to American history, the only real lesson D'Souza takes to heart is from P.T. Barnum -- 'There's a sucker born every minute.'" - Jonathan W. Hickman, The Newnan Times-Herald

Sucker born every minute is right. They won't win the election, but conservatives are flocking to this POS, and it might just be the top-grossing "documentary" of the year.

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