Oh noes! If you can't hold on to your basic, "queer"-hatin', low-information, unlicensed plumber not really named Joe that you hold up for WAAAAYYYY past his fifteen minutes as the epitome of the Republican Party, who can you hold on to?

Samuel Wurzelbacher, better known as Joe the Plumber, tells TIME he's so outraged by GOP overspending, he's quitting the party — and he's the bull's-eye of its target audience. But he also said he wouldn't support any cuts in defense, Social Security, Medicare or Medicaid — which, along with debt payments, would put more than two-thirds of the budget off limits. It's no coincidence that many Republicans who voted against the stimulus have claimed credit for stimulus projects in their district — or that Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal stopped ridiculing volcano-monitoring programs after a volcano erupted in Alaska. "We can't be the antigovernment party," Snowe says. "That's not what people want."

All this while the Republicans back-pedal off their "listening tour" to find out how real Republicans want their party to move towards because they can't bear the thought of upsetting Rush Limbaugh. Tellingly, the enabling and complicit Time Magazine completely buries the lede deep within the article--fourteen paragraphs down--that the man who owes his entire fame to the Republican Party is now taking his ball and going home.