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Colbert reports on the Oink-Mageddon

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Stephen Colbert joined the cable networks in their coverage of the swine-flu outbreak with his own special report titled: "Enemy Swine: A PigCalypse Now, The Coming Oink-Mageddon"

Unfortunately, Colbert's guest from the WHO is sick and can't make it. So he winds up answering questions from viewers and offering his usual, ah, sage advice.

The final question: "How do I get rid of this swine flu hysteria once and for all?"

Colbert:

Remember: swine flu feeds on our fear. All we have to do is stop being scared and follow the rational advice of experts. We've got to start thinking calmly so the panic will starve itself out. Because if we don't, we're all doomed. DOOOOOMED!!!

Sounds about right.

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17 Comments
sixandseveneights's picture

Frust!

Damn "u"!

But I've only seen one story on how REGULAR FLU kills thousands every year.

Ape-Man's picture

Mustn't let FOX viewers know that or there will be wide spread panic.


"Government by organized money is just as dangerous as Government by organized mob"
-= Franklin Delano Roosevelt =-

sixandseveneights's picture

How can I get tip on which big Pharma company is developing the vaccine for next year's pandemic.....fish flu? I want to buy stock now.

curtilingus's picture

Toflu. The first vegan borne flu virus.

JohnnyBravo's picture

Kung Flu


NOBODY 2012

sixandseveneights's picture

....elephant flu! It has killed 4500 American soldiers and hundreds of thousands of Iraqi civilians to date!

Aka: neocon fever or chickenhawk pox.

Whitehouse's picture

When an elephant sits on you face??

:)

Whitehouse's picture

The Netherlands.

A three-year old boy is in hospital after a visit to Mexico.

Happy to say that the medics told the press that he's doing fine and that family members, as well as passengers of the jetplane, were treated as well to prevent furder infections.

Ape-Man's picture

Incidentally ABC is getting stormed with anti ABC sentiment for releasing a story about the architects of their torture sysytem. looks like they could use a good comment over there!


"Government by organized money is just as dangerous as Government by organized mob"
-= Franklin Delano Roosevelt =-

Brad's picture

I'm eating healthy and take vitamins and other supplements, as allowed by hard-won grassroots DSHEA legislation. Too bad for people in Norway and Germany, though. Among other restrictions, businesses in these countries are permitted to sell Vitamin C pills containing no more than 200mg!

monkeyboy's picture

AHH-CHOINK

JohnnyBravo's picture

a damn good tagline for an upcoming horror flick. You could make some money :-)


NOBODY 2012

Embittered Angry Anti-Republicrat Max-Hussein-1's picture
.

a joke ~ ~

People used to say that pigs would fly when a black man gets into that White House. Now that Obama has finished his first 100 days, whadda-ya know...
... Swine flu flew!!!

.


Starve the WAR Beast...
... Feed Americans.

real_earl's picture
..

I'm Boycotting NewsCorp! Heres what not to buy: http://www.cjr.org/resources/index.php?c=news...

The local media in my neck of the woods are hysterically urging people to buy up every pharmaceutical product known to man and to stock up on food. Y2K redux.

ricky's picture

this is remarkably close to the point Limbaugh was making yesterday for his own nefarious reasons.


"The deal has to be negotiated in the real world, not on some idealized Aristotelian plane. We understand that. A 100-percent deal may be impossible."
Famous "Reality Based" Commentator

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