Just What We Need: Another Reason to Drive
I suppose we'll have to sit with hands clasped and eyes straight ahead, too. And heaven forbid you need to use the bathroom! (Better get out the adult Depends.)
Why, it'll be just like being back in Catholic school. Good thing so many of us are unemployed and can't afford to fly:
In the wake of the terrorism attempt Friday on a Northwest Airlines flight, federal officials on Saturday imposed a new layer of restrictions on travelers that could lengthen lines at airports and limit the ability of international passengers to move about an airplane.
Among other steps being imposed, passengers on international flights coming to the United States will apparently have to remain in their seats for the last hour of a flight without any personal items on their laps. Overseas passengers will be restricted to only one carry-on item aboard the plane, and domestic passengers will probably face longer security lines.
The restrictions will again change the routine of air travel, which has undergone an upheaval since the terrorist attacks in New York and Washington in September 2001 and three attempts at air terrorism since then.
Just a day after the attempt on Friday, travelers at airports around the world began experiencing heightened screening in security lines. On one flight, from Newark Airport, flight attendants kept cabin lights on for the entire trip instead of dimming them for takeoff and landing.
If we have to sit in our seats for the last hour, how are we going to tackle future terrorists four seats away?
"Sir, sit down, sit down sir, you are not allowed to leave your seat!"
Let us check your shoes for any bombs..
None
So remember to set off your incendiary devices at least 1 hour and 1 minute before landing.
I think we should issue little baseball bats to all passengers. Unless the wily terrorists are in the majority on the plane they will lose.
No reason to worry about carry-ons or laptops.
:)
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
you want complete order on a plane, get some frustrated 60+ year old woman with a bad attitude dressed in a heavy, dark, uncomfortable, multi layered outfit walking the aisles with a ruler in her hand. I guarantee, you'll have order!
"Mr. ____, put your hands on your lap or you'll rue the day you were born!"
"Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying..."-------Roger Waters, "Comfortably Numb"
I think they need to bring back the young stuff in thigh high miniskirts.
Nothing prevents trouble like a bunch of middle aged men trying to suck in the paunch to attract a girl half their age, that they never would've had a shot with even when they were that age.
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
Sister Mary Elephant would make an excellent "stewardess".
(Boy, I remember stewardesses. They were great. Now we have "flight attendants", who suck. Sad decline.)
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
No difference in their policies...
What level of alert are they going to raise the threat level to...
If the Emanuel / Obama administration now in trouble with their policies so they bring out the old color code alert??
What are we suppose to do,, be the unpaid force of the dept. Of Homeland Security force..
None
your last question. It's obvious. Yes.
to assume that you are protected by any government entity.
Police, Air Marshals, Fire do not protect and serve, they respond.
After the shit has already hit the fan, they show up. That's not a slam against them. It's just the logistical fact of the matter.
Self-protection is and always has been the only protection you have as a human being.
Get used to it.
"After the shit has already hit the fan, they show up."
That's true except for:
Commander guy Bunnypants, Darth Cheney, AL "gonzo" Gonzales, Kkkarl Rove, et al.
If the crimes are by politicians - we just don't look back we look forward and unless looking forward we need to preempt these criminals - they all walk!
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
And it's not hard to understand. It's also our completely feeble sense of risk assessment.
Morons. The lot. You want to prevent terror attacks?
Renounce Empire. Bring your troops home and be a fair dealer. Can't do that? Then expect people to dedicate their lives to your destruction. It's not that hard to understand.
This means:
depaving and removing the suburbs.
developing permacultural systems, universally throughout your country.
Electricity only available during certain hours.
The end of the globalised economy.
the end of obesity.
the end of American Arrogance.
no more travel by aircraft.
living within limits and conditions required by the environment.
Don't like it? Tough. Consider yourself part of the problem.
It's called the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.
-George Carlin
We just need to remember to duck and cover.
the silliest prescription for Utopia I have ever seen.
Hasa Diga Eebowai
Have fun swirling down the drain. Like it or not, it's the way we live that is killing us. Our only destiny is to choke to death on our own shit. That's been the end of the story all along; we just didn't know it until now.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
to spend a huge amount of resources and energy to rip up existing housing stock and relocate those populations to what? Camps? Barracks? And those people will do what for a living? Write poetry? They certainly won't be making anything without electric power. Those hours of electricity will they be during the day or night? Will these unemployed hoards be huddling in the dark in whatever facility you've decided to concentrate them? What the hell does permaculture mean anyway? Is it like permanent press? Frankly this doesn't sound like anything a rationale person would want so presumably the unenlightened hoards will have to be compelled to join in. The future can't get much more dystopian than this.
Hasa Diga Eebowai
airport security...
Remember now...stand and wait in the nice long line.
And we're gonna make sure that we DON'T pat you down to make sure you've got anything TAPED TO YOUR LEG..(re:Abdul Farouk Abdulmutallab)...but you better take off your shoes...or else we'll be suspicious...
And whatever you do, don't complain about the simple-minded warmongering policies that led to all this...
"end of American Arrogance"
Don't hate us for being the best - hate us for our neverending freedumb!
(/snark)
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
the never-ending DUMB?
It's Dumb!
And, never fear for our Captains of Empire - they have private luxury aircraft.
Other than that....FEAR EVERYTHING!
You can bet your ass that no one flying in the cushy first class cabins with their champagne and fancy lounges are going to be putting their laptops down when they have a presentation to complete before they land.
They have meetings to go to and millions in profit streams are on the line. I don't think little Miss Susie Q is going to be telling Mr. Hot Shit he has to put his lap top away for the last hour of the flight.
And what about someone who REALLY has to go to the bathroom? Diarrhea happens.
Kids happen.
Perhaps The Department of Homeland Security could take their heads out of their asses and simply do the same kind of background checks on everyone who is flying that are done when we go to visit the Pres?
Back in the 90's when Clinton was first elected they needed some of us from Santa Monica to be "drivers" in Clinton's motorcade from LAX to Santa Monica College and they asked me if I'd help. I gave them my Cali drivers license and I was cleared. That little ol' license can reveal a whole lot of information about a person.
It would be simpler to do this background check on everyone flying and then maybe they'd discover the wingnuts trying to board a plane!
If I want to fly to Maui or where ever I would be perfectly happy to submit to a background check. I just hope they don't hold my acid tongue against me in the course of my little criticisms of the U.S. government.
BTW, here's a pertinent new ad from Amnesty International that speaks to "words":
http://www.youtube.com/amnestyusa?tr=y&auid=5...
"The US has an army of 90,000 soldiers in Afghanistan and is spending $100bn a year, but has still been unable to defeat 20,000-25,000 Taliban who receive no pay at all." - Patrick Cockburn
Seriously? You want to fly from one US state to another, and you'd be happy to submit to a background check?
This country is lost.
YOU'RE AMERICANS. YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE FREE. THIS 'SECURITY THEATRE' IS BULLSHIT.
It's an infringement on your freedom, and you should not be happy to cede more authority to the government.
and we are as throughly searched and inconvenienced by "security" as any one else. Maybe more, since the 9/11 hijackers were traveling first class.
Also, the "fancy champagne" isn't very good. I ask for OJ and mix them together.
Also- its been a few years since I travelled. I got to go business/first class because of miles accrued, not wealth. I think that's the case for most 1st-Classers'.
Or:
"the never-ending FEAR-DUMB?"
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
This word lover LOVES that coinage.
Sums up the U.S. perfectly.
BID
Bidet mate...
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
the proposed mandatory passenger flight attire. It's absolutely fabulous. Blaze orange pocketless jumpsuits, crocs and manacles
Hasa Diga Eebowai
Makes me look like a Skittle.
NOBODY 2012
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/united_a...
What the hell? What happened to my country? The one that knew the only thing to fear is fear itself?
CNN keeps showing all these sheep at the airport bleating "Whatever it takes to keep us safe..."
IDIOTS.
The only effective change since 9/11 is that passengers no longer expect hijackers to want blackmail. They expect to be killed and so they respond appropriately.
I was "hopeful" that Obama would get rid of the stupid shoe rule. Now they're making it worse and FOR WHAT?
There have been 3 failed hijacking attempts in the 8+ years since 9/11 and all were foiled by passengers. Not the TSA, not air marshalls: passengers.
And our response to an idiot who set off firecrackers is to make even more ridiculous rules?
We should not be subject to pat downs just b/c we want to fly across the country. Assholes are taking toys and blankets from babies. Because THAT will make us safer.
How about telling Americans to ACT LIKE AMERICANS and stop being afraid of our shadows? Stop giving up freedoms for the pretense of safety.
Inconveniencing millions is not making anyone safer. It is stupidity. It is giving Osama bin Laden EXACTLY what he wanted.
We're all suffering because of a handfuls of idiots. "Whatever keeps us safe"? That's another way of saying "Sure I'll give up my freedom and allow more inconveniences"
After all this mess, a guy with EXPLOSIVES and is supposed to be on the watched list is allowed on the plane? I swear the TSA, no the whole government is filled with complete imbeciles.
They want us to be afraid because fear generates money. Have too much toothpaste/cologne/lotion/shampoo? Gotta throw it out and BUY more when you land. Whatever keeps us safe! I wager that this year the same rules are going to be applied to Amtrak and Greyhound. Hell, take it all the way: You have to submit to a patdown before you enter your own car.
Osama bin Laden has won. We can't do shit anymore.
NOBODY 2012
Why are you still buying the OBL meme?
It's so passe.
"The US has an army of 90,000 soldiers in Afghanistan and is spending $100bn a year, but has still been unable to defeat 20,000-25,000 Taliban who receive no pay at all." - Patrick Cockburn
OBL claimed that blowing up the WTC would cause the country to fracture into separate states out of fear.
I thought it was really funny and showed a fundamental misunderstanding of how the US was one nation, as opposed to the USSR or EU.
Turns out I was the one under a delusion. More people die in traffic accidents per year than died in 9/11, but that one act of terrorism drove the country insane. We 'preemptively attack' and keep our people on a constant terror alert. Anyone who doubts the authority is a traitor...
...even now, with our new Administration, with all our votes for change, what happens? I thought I could go back to wearing my shoes, but no, now assholes are going to tell my kids they can't use the bathroom or play with a toy or read a book simply b/c some jerk blew his balls off with firecrackers.
Because that's a sane and rational response.
"OBL claimed that blowing up the WTC would cause the country to fracture into separate states out of fear."
I've always figured the guy is a genius myself. They portray him as a "dirty" and primitave cave-dweller, but he was totally onto how America works.
(and if not ObL, whomever is into power and control)
far left loon >.<
arbitrary rules that do nothing, this guy walked right into the plane in africa. no secondary check in Amsterdam. the tsa goons knew about this guy for two years, his father warned 'officials' about him. now we have to hold our piss for an hour before landing. what if this clown did this in the first hour of flight, make us all sit until we piss on the floor? this whole thing is a charade to justify the billions going down the toilet for the wars, TSA, and other military industrial complex nonsense. take my shoes off for what, one clown who got thru security in europe? pat down and scan grandma for what? make me sit by the fat slob and the screaming kids, while the waitress's called steward's slack off in the back of the plane, and the pilots are paid less than walmart workers. next will be bend over and kiss your ass goodby.
we are in the last days folks, and it aint about jesus, its about the ineptitude of the usa, bushy and western governments........
was standing in the wings just waiting to be launched?
Just like The Patriot Act?
9/11 happened and SCHAZAM!!!, there was The Patriot Act....all 800 pages of it ready to go!
Then this goof ball pulled his stunt and BINGO! NEW RULES!
"The US has an army of 90,000 soldiers in Afghanistan and is spending $100bn a year, but has still been unable to defeat 20,000-25,000 Taliban who receive no pay at all." - Patrick Cockburn
Do they really think all terrorists would wait till the last hour just because one of them did? Or, if that is the case, why would passengers sitting be better than passengers walking around?
Total idiocy. Our torturing made me ashamed to be American, this is just embarrassing.
We survived the cold war with the Soviet Union aiming thousands of nuclear weapons at us. We lived our lives and went about our business - good times.
Nowadays we have a non-state handful of dead-enders and we are supposed to cower in fear and give up our rights?
We have become a weak kneed version of what America should be.
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
What a joke we are.
How did this become a nation of whimpering pussies?
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
Why The President Went Golfing Today
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
(the freedom to fly naked)
audit-prosecute-incarcerate
flying united?!?
Better than flying untied even!
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
You think air travel was bad before? Those airplanes are going to smell pretty bad from people pissing in their seats the last hour.
What if we quit dropping bombs on wedding parties?
"What if we quit dropping bombs on wedding parties?"
There is a whole industry supporting those bombs - you must be a socialist and why do you hate Amerika?
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
...and Americans pay for it.
audit-prosecute-incarcerate
Don't slutty girls in Catholic schools keep their shoes nice and polished?
It's like a mirror.
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
You're smarter than I am - I never thought of that!
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
They're flashing secret signals to each other on their plans for a coups d'état in catechism class
But why their into cat's chism I have no idea.
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
Black people with foreign-sounding names will bear the brunt of it now...
You took the words out of my mouth.
NOBODY 2012
When airport security gives me flack about my toothpaste or cologne, I'm just going to hold my laughter until I get to the plane.
I wish there was another way to travel...
http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/153051
NOBODY 2012
Or our flavored body lotions.
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
hear the story about the leg bombers father that warned the FBI about his son months ago and nothing was done about it?
I figure about the same amount of time it took an ex wrestler Governor that isn't too bright to hear from an air traffic controller that the hijackers were already in the cockpit before takeoff on flight 11 and they still let them go ahead and fly.
James Woods warned the FBI about the 9/11 attackers, and they just laughed him off. Then a week later the WTC was bombed, and suddenly they took him very seriously. Seriously enough to show up at his door asking what he knew about it. WHICH HE'D ALREADY TOLD THEM.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
I suggest that the safest measure would be to require that everyone strip completely and wear hospital jonnies on board. You can have your clothes back once you've reached your destination.
But what happens when some terrorist has a bomb surgically implanted? It's going to happen someday, and after that the only way to get on an airplane is to undergo a full-body x-ray.
...it won't stop them, they'll just find alternative methods.
Like feeding beans to the horses that'll draw our carriages?
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
You bastards!
:-)
NOBODY 2012
Not stage-door jonnies?
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
Is that a Steely Dan reference?
:)
"I know that there are people who do not love their fellow
man, and I hate people like that! " ~ Tom Lehrer (1928 - )
Steely-Dan is one of the 70's bands I'm trying hard to forget
Like:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGD27WgtKhI
Diabolus est Deus Inversus
even going to click that link ys, fusion-pop-jazz is "smooth" like the belly of an eel and just as disgusting.
Steely Dan is to smooth jazz like scrotum clamps and ball gags are to jockey shorts and throat lozenges.
I suggest you take a deeper look.
the ones with the back opening "stage door" yes that's what i meant.
Before the holidays. It will be interesting to see if there are more "issues" to follow that will protect profits.
I got an explanation for you...
it's called recession. Factories aren't producing, and people worldwide are consuming less...
I'm surprised oil isn't cheaper than it is!
audit-prosecute-incarcerate
What's to love about taking a cab for miles out of town (or driving to an expensive overnight lot) to arrive at some of the ugliest architecture on earth, to be served by some of the most brow-beaten serfs around (and ritually displaying your shoes to one of them), for the right to get wedged into a seat on a Greyhound of the sky in order to stare out at that nothingness for however long it takes to arrive at another ugly pile of glass and aluminum to take another ride to get anywhere?
Not to get all David Bowie about not flying, but take Amtrak whenever feasible. If _only_ we had first-world rail the horrible sucking sound of American's souls being stolen would be lessened somewhat.
Another reason to take the train.
A thought experiment on the inevitability of evolving terrorist tactics....
http://thetimchannel.wordpress.com/2009/12/27...
Enjoy.
Mom always told me I was special and I believed her.
Considering those X-ray machines that show what you look like naked, I'd say that's already becoming a reality. They haven't decided to use them yet, but I'm anticipating the news any day now. It'll be very interesting to see if and how passengers take the news that the TSA thugs will be spending their days looking at all of them naked and making crass jokes around the water cooler.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
It's only a matter of time before we have to go through the same procedures to get aboard a plane that the scientists went through to get to Level 5 in Andromeda Strain.
It took American Airlines twenty-one hours to carry me from Tulsa to Philadelphia. I realized I could drive it in 18 highway hours, and the savings would pay for a decent hotel room halfway there.
Besides, I can carry a gun legally in 22 states... but never on an airplane. It's much easier to keep my holster on, load way more crap into my Crown Vic than I could ever afford to check, and blast down the highway at 87 mph.
I say let the passenger airlines die, the Rethugs and Blue Tick fake Democrats are always gong on about the Free Market. Let them die and don't forget to pay back all the subsidies you have soaked up over the years.
Let's see you can't smoke on the plane or in the Airport, get ripped off from the moment you park your car at the Airport, get treated like scum by the TSA, etc. And you have to get there early...
Don't even think about bringing a Starbucks cup on board, but they will be glad to charge you for a cup of crappy drip coffee on board.
Or you can drive your own car, leave when you want to, rest when you want to, drink & eat what you want to, smoke 'em if you got 'em, listen to whatever music you wish, are not crammed into a micro seat, don't have to stand in line for an eternity to check in, don't have to rent a car when I get there.
Unless I'm headed to London or somewhere else across an ocean I'd rather drive. Really I'd rather ride a train.
Don't intend to ever fly a commercial flight unless it is an emergency! There is just to much bullshit involved.
That's not a big deal. Most people are in their seats anyway.
One carry on piece of luggage. I'm all for that. They should put a size limit on it too. Some of the people that bring bags that are way too big should put them below instead. If one of those bags lands on ya. It won't be fun. And of course these people put these over sized bags in the oh/compartment away from them. Or they're late and they can't get it in. Bumping into the people below them.
I don't see this as anything major.
Except if you have to go to the bathroom.
But luggage should not be an extra charge. That's bullshit.
What is your conceptual, continuity?
and Goatherder Osama won.
how eagerly those assholes just did everything Osama wanted, wasn't it? Through the whole thing, I've been scratching my head wondering how FUCKING STUPID could they get? They just marched to his tune every step of the way.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
This is exactly why I drive. Fuck flying. Fuck the TSA. Fuck their stupid knee-jerk reactionary rules. Next thing you know everyone will have to shave their heads because some moron decided to hide a bomb in their beehive hairdo.
Fuck the terrorists. They won.
would end in less than a week if everyone would just refuse to fly, drive,walk crawl if need be, I would not fly if my life depended on it...fuck-em. CEO,citizens,eyes,open
I've already decided I'm never flying again, or at least not until this insane nonsense is ended. Life is full of uncertainties, you could die crossing the street in front of your house, so I refuse to be bullied into paranoid hysteria just because the government doesn't know how to spin the bad P.R. involved with terrorist activity. When the world of flying comes back to its senses, then maybe I'll board a plane. Until then, sorry Jack, I'm keeping my feet on the ground.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
dump all airline stock.
on the new Boeing Dream liner. Better dump Boeing stock too.
The only thing the pax will be dreaming of are restrooms.
People will slowly get more and more fed up with airline travel and either opt for other ways or just stay home. Little by little, the industry will shrink, as the population reorganizes its lives around staying closer to home. Families will not split up so far apart, commuting will go down. With the growing rise of telecommuting and web work, internet communications and cheap internet video-phoning, traveling far distances will become less and less important. This will help with our environmental problems and make life more pleasant as well. Everyone wins.
Except the airline industry, of course. But hey, they're the ones shooting themselves in the foot here, by kowtowing to the thugs at the TSA. Make your bed, lie in it.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
are they kowtowing? They are forced by the Gov to follow what the TSA says. They have no choice.
They could put up something of a fight. They could protest. They could send their lobbyists to wine and dine senators to stop this nonsense. Nobody is holding a gun to anyone in the industry's head on this. They've marched lock, stock and barrel as meekly as possible into this hole, when they could have put up a fight right at the beginning. Now they're in too deep to dig themselves out of the hole.
Nothing is a matter of force in this country when there's big money to be thrown around.
There's always free cheddar in the mousetrap, baby. - Tom Waits
changing our foreign policy would make the airlines safer. With Peace all things are possible. How many terrorist will we make in Afghanistan by sending in thousands more troops?
the answer is easy and very simple.
Ban all commercial air traffic.
No planes, no traffic, no terrorists, no passengers. Guaranteed.
100% passenger 'safety'.
Since this isn't going to happen, it's obviously NOT about 'safety' of passengers... now is it?
Honestly this is what they wanted and our leaders seem more then happy to keep giving them exactly that. Terrorist relized they can't bring down our country on there own they need us to do it for them, and this is just another case of them continuing to win.
..if they start placing restrictions on when & who drives.
And I bet the secret police ie "Homeland Security" has already placed you on your "no-ride-or-drive" list. They may forbid you from even driving your own car w/out signing a "loyalty oath"..
The list is obviously a joke and only used/abused to inconvenience liberals.
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