Governor Chris Christie held a two-hour press conference today to try and deflect blame from himself over the "bridgegate' scandal that has resulted in him firing his deputy chief of staff Bridget Anne Kelly, and ousting his 2013 campaign manager Bill Stepien.

A series of e-mails and text messages disclosed Wednesday show that a senior aide and appointees of New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie forced days of traffic jams as apparent political retribution against a Democratic mayor, throwing a cloud of scandal over the Republican Party’s leading 2016 presidential hopeful.The communications show that Christie’s deputy chief of staff and two of his top appointees at the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey closed a pair of access lanes from Fort Lee, N.J., onto the George Washington Bridge into New York, causing days of gridlock and mayhem in the Fort Lee area in September.

In his remarks today, Christie mostly played the role of victim and repeatedly said he was lied to by his staffers, who were "stupid." He said he had no knowledge of what they were doing. It was one of the greatest narcissistic pity parties I've ever seen He spent very little time discussing the effects this political attack had on the citizens of New Jersey and the hardship it caused many. He did use the word "apologize" twenty four times, but it the word was often repeated because of reporters questions. Instead, he continually proclaimed how sad he was at what had happened to him and how bad it made him feel.

I am responsible for what happened. I am sad to report to the people of New Jersey that we fell short.

And so for that too I am sad today to have to take this action.

And I'm saddened to have to do this.

I'm sad. I'm sad. That's the predominant emotion I feel right now is sadness, sadness that I was betrayed by a member of my staff, sadness that I had people who I entrusted with important jobs who acted completely inappropriately, sad that that's led the people of New Jersey to have less confidence in the people that I've selected. The emotion that I've been displaying in private is sad.

But the fact is right now I'm sad.

And you can only imagine, as I was standing there in my bedroom with my iPad, looking at that, how incredibly sad and betrayed I felt.

But I am a very sad person today.

I'm sad. I'm a sad guy standing here today, and very disappointed.

It's a sad day for me. And I'm doing what I'm obligated to do under this job, because it's the right thing to do, and I'm doing it. But it doesn't make me angry at the moment. It just makes me sad.

You see? It's all about him. Christie also said the word "betray" at least six times in the context that he was betrayed, and not the people of New Jersey.

I permitted to be in that circle of trust for the last five years betrayed my trust.

I was betrayed by a member of my staff

How incredibly sad and betrayed I felt.

A person close to me betrayed me, a person who I counted on and trusted for five years betrayed me. A person who I gave a high government office to betrayed me.

The word 'humiliate" comes in around four times as well.

I am embarrassed and humiliated by the conduct of some of the people on my team.

I feel humiliated by this.

But I am humiliated by the fact that I did not know this and that I was deceived.

And as a said before, the whole matter is humiliating to me

The word "bully" did come up and he denied being one.

On the other hand, that's very, very different than saying that, you know, someone's a bully.

But I am not a bully.

And I understand why some people would then characterize that, especially people who don't like you, as bullying, but it's not that.

That reminded me when Richard Nixon said these immortal words: "I'm not a crook."

Yet he only said the word "sorry" three times that I counted off the transcript.

Well, I just did. I said I'm sorry for that, and I would have never made that joke if I knew the facts that have come forward to me today.

Yeah, I'm sorry.

And I'm sorry to all the people of the state that they have to be, you know, occupied with this matter.

If somebody wants to do a song parody on Cream's version of I'm So Glad, replacing jack Bruce's voice with Christie's or a facsimile, I'll post it on C&L.