Glenn Beck Marries FreedomWorks For The Dowry

Poor, poor Glenn Beck. Faced with plummeting ratings, advertisers abandoning ship like rats in a storm, and a boss on a tear about the help doing po

Poor, poor Glenn Beck. Faced with plummeting ratings, advertisers abandoning ship like rats in a storm, and a boss on a tear about the help doing political things, what else is there to do but look for an arranged marriage?

Lucky for Beck, Dick Armey is always on the lookout for a good dirt hill upon which to plant his AstroTurf. Need meets need, and ... a partnership is born. FreedomWorks, meet Glenn Beck. He only slept with Americans for Prosperity a few times ... he's still pure enough for you.

Listen carefully to the very beginning:

BECK: This half-hour is sponsored by FreedomWorks

Then the long explanation of how the elopement happened. From the beginning, I'm guessing the NRA didn't want to sponsor him? Toward the end of his little speech, there's this:

And we must, must, must link arms with people. Everybody plays a different role. My message to you is to shore yourself up personally, with history, with faith, and with your own personal finances. That is my course that I am charting. I’ve got to move away from the political stuff. That is what kept me up last night. But political stuff has got to be done. You have to pay attention. There are things that are happening in Washington that you have to know about. We need the Tea Party protests to continue. We need to organize and reach out to each other. So I want you to go to Freedomworks.org, because freedom works.

See, Rupert already smacked Hannity down, and Beck has a benefit planned for August. Enter FreedomWorks, ready to accept all the Glenn Beck faithful into their fold.

As if they're not there already.

(h/t Think Progress)

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