by Mel Seesholtz, Ph.D. for Counterbias If you're living in the American theocracy under the reign of King George the W, learning American StupidSp
April 6, 2005

by Mel Seesholtz, Ph.D. for Counterbias

If you're living in the American theocracy under the reign of King George the W, learning American StupidSpeak (ASS) is an unfortunate necessity. But the process is quite easy and requires no thought, just an empty mind. With that in mind, let's begin.

For pre-election 2004 classic examples of ASS, go to the on-line archives of Focus on the Family, an organization run by Dr. James Dobson of SpongeBob fame. There you can find the article "Debate-Tested Sound Bites on Defending Marriage" by Glenn T. Stanton. Just click for downloadable "helpful, debate-tested soundbites for defenders of natural marriage and the family."

"Natural marriage"? Prior to ASS, "natural marriage" would have been a flashing neon oxymoron. Sex is natural. "Marriage" is a word denoting a highly contrived civil contract the historical purpose of which was to convey property and legacy, as well as to secure financial perks and legal rights. For most of the history of the institution called "marriage," the unions were arranged, the wife (wives and/or concubines approved in Gen: 4:19, 29:17-28, II Samuel 3:2-5, 5:13 and I Kings 11:3) were little more than property and love, although sometimes involved, was certainly not necessary.

"Defenders of the family"? In this usage, ASS demonstrates how it transmogrifies the real-world quality of other forms of communication, such as Polynesian languages that have no words for "ice" and Eskimo languages that have no words for "palm trees." ASS recognizes only heterosexual families: families with same-sex parents are simply not part of the lexicon and, therefore, non-existent in the ASS zeitgeist. For example, all the evangelical Christian Right lobbying groups call themselves "pro-family" despite the fact that they vehemently fight any form of benefits for same-sex families. Before ASS, the validity of the "pro-family" identification would have been negated by real-world facts such as those from the Adoption Family Center that document there are between 8 and 10 million children being reared in gay and lesbian families...More 


Physician of the Year or GOP choose 

Craig's Thoughts,Theories and Tantrums

ABCnews reports that physicians all over America are being awarded the distinction of "Physician of the Year". Seems strange that so many people can get such an award in any given year. There is one stipulation that you make a $1,250 contribution to the National Republican Congressional Committee. The reward is the opportunity to travel to Washington for the scheduled events March 14-15, which included a tax-reform workshop as well as appearances by House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, R-Texas, and President Bush.

Seems like an ethical no-no, but Delay is involved so it must be legit. But it gets more suspicious, "The Republicans, under the direction of DeLay, came up with the idea for the awards five years ago as a means of helping to raise funds for the congressional campaign efforts for their party. ... In fact, signs reading "A Celebration of the House Republican Majority" and "Moving America's Agenda" decorated the hotel ballroom where last month's events were held."More

Can you help us out?

For 18 years we have been exposing Washington lies and untangling media deceit, but now Facebook is drowning us in an ocean of right wing lies. Please give a one-time or recurring donation, or buy a year's subscription for an ad-free experience. Thank you.


We welcome relevant, respectful comments. Any comments that are sexist or in any other way deemed hateful by our staff will be deleted and constitute grounds for a ban from posting on the site. Please refer to our Terms of Service for information on our posting policy.