June 21, 2018

Rudy Giuliani appeared on Fox News with Bill Hemmer to deliver some very reassuring talk about our Baby-Jailer-In-Chief. Rudy wants everyone to know just how deeply Trumpy Bear feels the pain of these families. The ones that his own policies are ripping apart. I mean, NO ONE feels worse about it than trump does. Not even the families going through it. Rudy KNOWS this.

GIULIANI: I spoke to the president this morning as I do almost every morning.

HEMMER: What did he say?

GIULIANI: We didn't talk about it! I'm not...this isn't my area. I try to stay out of it.


He went on whining about Democrats being the ones to blame, that President Cheeto Dust is so stoic taking heat from the right and from the left on immigration for wanting a comprehensive solution, that his bestie Donnie is the real victim, blah, blah, blah. Then, America's Mayor's Dentures spouted,

GIULIANI: It's a tragedy, and nobody feels this more than Donald Trump, believe me.

HEMMER: Is that what he told you?

GIULIANI: *pause* I KNOW that. *awkward laugh*


And if you believe that djt feels anything other than a desire for diet coke, a Playboy model's ass to rest it on, and the ability to whiten the entirety of the country, you just have not been paying attention.

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