— October 15, 2026

We have now reached a point where the sitting president of the United States of America is standing on a stage and openly, proudly declaring his fantasies about shooting people whom he feels have wronged him by leaking secret information to the press.

The deeply disturbing remarks came during his rally in Bullhead, Arizona, last night, on the most recent leg of his desperate, last-ditch campaign to save his party from complete and utter ruin in next month's midterm elections.

Speaking to the crowd, the US president boldly declared, "In my opinion, leakers should be shot. In the old days, we used to shoot leakers, you know?"

Most of the crowd cheered in agreement and approval.

His anger seemed driven specifically by the "sleazebag" leaker who told The New York Times and CNN about his plan to strike Iran in 2025. He claimed that the source revealed to the publications that he was prepared to send "totally stealth" B-2 bombers to obliterate Iran's nuclear facilities and included details regarding what time the planes would leave from Missouri.

Trump told his supporters that, after the leak, he considered aborting the mission altogether in talks with General Don "Razin" Caine, but in the end decided to move forward with Operation Midnight Hammer, just delayed by a couple of days, despite the leak.

Even though his plan was still able to move forward (and now we're stuck in a potential forever with Iran yet again that's squaring up to give George Bush one hell of a run for his money), Trump still stood steadfast in his opinion that anyone who leaks secret details should be "shot."

"When they leak what time you’re going to attack a country — and the reason you’re attacking is really for defense, because you don’t want them to have a weapon that can blow up millions of people at one shot — No, leakers should be dealt with very, very strongly," the president said from the stage. "To me, they're the scum of the earth."

When it comes to Iran, specifically, and his ongoing war with the nation that was supposed to be settled in a matter of weeks and is now steamrolling well into its seventh month and counting, Trump attempted to joke that he "might've went too far" and killed too many of the country's leaders, because now he doesn't have anyone to negotiate with.

I'd like off this ride now, please. I'm done. I'm dizzy, and I feel like I might throw up.

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