Wonkette:

Is it still a Hate Crime?

Ann Arbor student and official Fark photoshop subject Justin Zatkoff wasn’t actually beaten silly by leftists, blacks, militant homosexuals, pansies, hippies or violinists. He was clobbered by his own “friends,” who hate him.

That’s what police in Ann Arbor have finally revealed about last weekend’s pathetic incident, which a Michigan website frequented by campus conservatives claimed was some kind of retribution for his political views. But no, it was just retribution for him being a a drunken asshole around his high-school buddies. Next martyr, please!