Donald J. Trump apparently has a fascinating new definition of “dead," according to his latest Truth Social outburst.
Hours after the United States resumed strikes against Iran, Trump took to his shitposting platform to announce that Iran is a “Failed Nation” and, more definitively, “DEAD.” Because apparently a country can be dead and still require the occasional bombing campaign.
Trump claimed Iran has essentially nothing left: no functioning navy, no air force, a worthless currency, and a government that supposedly can't even pay its soldiers or police. He also threw in a staggering claim that inflation has reached 300 percent, because why stop at merely declaring victory when you can throw a few gigantic numbers into the mix?
It's a wildly overstated claim, and we can only assume that Natalie Harp is taking Iran's already extremely high inflation rate and turning it into an even more extreme number for her boss. Who knows. Or, perhaps, that hamster powering his brain doesn't have much to work with.
Trump also accused Iran's government of slaughtering more than 100,000 protesters and demanded that its leaders face war-crimes charges. He then attacked the media for supposedly spreading “fake news” about Iran, before concluding that the country's remaining asset is a “good line of bullshit.” Trump is very touchy about reports on the war he chose to launch.
Naturally, this declaration of Iran's demise arrived at roughly the same time that the shooting started up again.
The U.S. military resumed attacks after American forces said they spotted Iranian Revolutionary Guard forces preparing to launch rockets and deploy sea mines in the Strait of Hormuz. Iran subsequently retaliated by attacking two U.S. bases in Jordan.
Trump also previously claimed in an AI slop video that Iran's Kharg Island oil hub was being “blown to smithereens." There was just one small problem: there was no evidence that Kharg Island had actually been attacked. A U.S. official later said the island had not been targeted.
So, according to Trump, Iran is dead, its military is essentially nonexistent, its economy is toast, and its government is finished.
And yet somehow, we're still bombing each other.
Perhaps Trump has decided that “dead” is now a temporary condition—much like his previous declarations of victory.
