December 12, 2013

Lawmakers complaining about a bipartisan proposal that would give the U.S. its first budget agreement since 2009 have forgotten what it means to compromise, Daily Show host Jon Stewart argued on Wednesday.

The $1.012 trillion deal is halfway between the budget numbers Senate Democrats and House Republicans had agreed to. This is how four years of budgetary trench warfare ends? Stewart asked incredulously: "Why don't we split the difference?"

“It’s a compromise,” laments Stewart. “There’s no victory, there’s no sense of glory. It’s more like being in a bar at last call; the lights come on and you look at each other and go, ‘Well, if either of us could do any better we wouldn’t be here. So let’s go f*ck behind a Sonic.”

Senior political correspondent John Oliver saw things a little differently, putting the "miraculous" budget compromise up there with the Civil Rights Act. To illustrate how far each side had to budge to get this modest compromise, Oliver read from profanity-laden (fake) transcripts of the budget meetings between Sen. Patty Murray (D-WA) and Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI).

The best part of the segment is when Oliver and Stewart get into a shouting match over the meaning of the movie "E.T."

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