Resolved: To Make 2016 A Year I Manage To Get Through
Credit: Ewokzinho
January 1, 2016

Here it is, 2016, a fresh new start. Things will be different this year, and not just different but better. Way better! So much better, next year at this time we won't even have to do a New Year's resolution. Everything we resolved will have come true.

Perfect! Can't wait!

I'm lying! Not true!

But you knew that.

Let me say once again that New Year’s Resolutions are a fun way to pass the time but are meaningless in the real world. Not wishing to burst your feel-good bubble on the very first day of the new year; just telling you, in case you woke up this morning actually believing that all it takes to do some serious life-changing before the next year is out is to sincerely resolve to do it on New Year’s Day.

Some people believe a resolution is not legit unless you say it out loud to someone who might actually remember–and care–later on. I’ve done it myself in the days when I couldn’t have started the year without a list of resolutions. It was a good luck gesture I almost really believed in. Sort of like not stepping on a crack to avoid breaking your mother’s back.

But over time I realized the surest way to disappoint myself in the worst way possible was to promise myself (most sincerely, because no other way would do) that I wouldn’t be a complete failure again. This year I would finally do what I’ve been meaning to do, and this time I mean it.
Sometimes I would even make a list–actually write things down:

Lose 20 pounds.

Make a lot of money with my writing.

Travel to that place I’ve always wanted to go.

Okay, lose 10 pounds.

Okay, make any money with my writing.

Okay, at least get out of the state.

Then, thankfully, I would lose the list, and any remnants of any long ago resolution would drift away, never to be heard from again until next New Year’s Eve, when those long-ago resolutions would come back and hit me like a ton of bricks. I promised! I resolved! I said them out loud! I didn’t do any of them! (Except to get out of the state. I did manage to do that. But who couldn’t when you live 20 miles from the border?)

So this year you could follow my lead, save yourself a lot of headaches, and just bypass that tradition. The world won’t come to an end. The year will start, the days will go by, one by one, and nobody will notice that you didn’t make a resolution.

I didn’t know that when I was young. I went along, sheep-like, because everyone else did. I honestly thought I was the only one who didn’t keep her resolutions. I know better now. It’s the most freeing thing in the world to know my promises to myself are meaningless and therefore totally unnecessary.
You too can be free. Just say no. No resolutions! (If you think you can’t do it, write me. I’ll talk you down. I’ve been there. I know.)

So Happy New Year! Health! Prosperity! Love! Joy!

Carry on. . .

(Did some of you notice a similarity to last year's January 1st post? It's because I stole it and altered it slightly. Next year I'm hoping to be better at writing something original on the first day of the year. Hoping, but not promising.)

(Did you notice I didn't whisper a word about politics? Way up at the top I resolved not to, just to see if I could do it. I did it! Not sure I can keep on doing it, so I'll stop now. Happy New Year!)

Can you help us out?

For nearly 20 years we have been exposing Washington lies and untangling media deceit, but now Facebook is drowning us in an ocean of right wing lies. Please give a one-time or recurring donation, or buy a year's subscription for an ad-free experience. Thank you.


We welcome relevant, respectful comments. Any comments that are sexist or in any other way deemed hateful by our staff will be deleted and constitute grounds for a ban from posting on the site. Please refer to our Terms of Service for information on our posting policy.