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'Scoreboard Bitches!' Bill Maher Takes A Look At Which Side Is Winning In The 'Laboratories Of Democracy'

Bill Maher with a look at who is winning and who is losing in the so-called "laboratories of democracy."
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Bill Maher wrapped up this Friday's edition of Real Time with a look at Republican run states such as Kansas and Louisiana, or as their party likes to call them, the "laboratories of democracy" and what the results of years of trickle-down economics and tax breaks for the rich has done to their economies.

‘Scoreboard, Bitches!’: Maher Brags to the GOP That Liberal Ideas Are Winning Out:

Bill Maher ended his show tonight by contrasting how liberal ideas have thrived in California and how conservative ones haven’t done so well in Kansas and Louisiana, telling them, “Scoreboard, bitches!”

He pointed to how California is booming and said that if conservatives consider states laboratories of democracy, they should realize that “our mice are thriving, yours are dead.”

And what’s to blame for this? Maher brought it down to the binary choice: what happens when Democrats are in charge vs when Republicans are in charge.

As he noted, California seems to be doing pretty well despite all the warnings of doom and gloom from Republicans. Don't expect it to faze any of them though. Accepting reality has never been one of their strong points.

Here's the full transcript via BruinKid at Daily Kos:

And finally, New Rule: If Republicans are going to keep calling states laboratories of democracy, they have to start looking at the results from the lab. California raised taxes on the wealthy — a lot — and our economy is booming. We just passed France and India to become all by ourselves the world’s 6th largest economy. Soon to be 5th, thanks England!

Whereas states like Kansas and Louisiana that went back to the trickle down theory of “cut taxes on the rich and they’ll always do the right thing” are financial catastrophes. The results from the lab are in — our mice are thriving, yours are dead.

Now they say the definition of insanity is trying th same thing over and over and expecting different results, but I’m beginning to think that’s actually the definition of being a conservative. Because it’s not like we haven’t tried trickle down before, many times; it’s not new.


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Despite the fact that when he took office, Kansas Governor Sam Brownback (R) said, “we’ve got a different way, and it works.”

And by “works,” he meant it works the night shift at Del Taco. Yes, somehow, for the millionth time, when rich folks got a big tax cut, they pocketed it. And now Kansas is in a recession with a huge deficit. The band Kansas has more money.

Down in Louisiana, Bobby Jindal (R) tried the same stupid thing that Brownback did, and big surprise, the same result — a $1 billion dollar surplus became a $2 billion dollar deficit, and now everything’s getting cut. Because apparently, when you take in less money, you have less money to spend. Crazy! I guess you aren’t richer, the less cash you have. Unless you’re Donald Trump.

OK, so now let’s travel west to the laboratory called California, which, not that long ago, was being called an “economic basket-case.” Unmanageable, they said. A failed state. But this is when we had either Republican-led legislatures or a Republican governor.

Who turned out to be such a disaster, even his maid said, “I can’t believe I fucked that guy!”

And here’s the part where the experiment becomes crystal clear. Because after Arnold left office, we eliminated what scientists would call “variables” — in this case, the Republicans. (audience laughter) Democrats, from Governor on down, control every office and voting body in this state. So we can really study what happens when liberal policies are tried unimpeded.

And the only thing I have to say to Republicans about that is, scoreboard, bitches!!!

Republicans claimed cap-and-trade would drive up utility bills, but our electricity tab is now among the cheapest in the country! And I ought to know, because I use a lot of juice in my basement to grow my… orchids. My orchids!

California gave illegal immigrants driver’s licenses and college tuition, and conservatives said encouraging immigrants like that would destroy the economy. But it didn’t! Immigrants just take jobs Americans don’t want to do — like raising their children.

So maybe we are being invaded by Latinos and Asians, but it’s not making us weaker. It’s making us hotter.

We did all the stuff conservatives warned us would make things even worse. But the sky didn’t fall. Unemployment did. And growth shot up to over 4%. And a $26 billion dollar deficit became an $11 billion dollar surplus.

And that is mostly because we — horror of horrors — raised taxes on the rich. Fox News said we were insane, that the rich would flee the state! I mean, what does Laguna Beach have for wealthy people that they can’t find in Nebraska?

Folks, if states are laboratories of democracy, why are we wasting time replicating failed experiments? I thought the idea behind science is that you try something, and if it doesn’t work, you try something else. You run these experiments, so you can see which ones work. And the ones that do, are replicated to other states. And the ones that don’t, are sent to Florida.

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