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Whew! Donald Trump 'Positive' Rick Scott Has Zika Under Control!

Oh but there's so much more....

Yay! Donald Trump thinks Rick Scott, that Bat-Boy-resembling Governor of Florida (and Trump supporter so you KNOW he's doing terrific amazing things that are fabulous and huge, I heard many people say so) is doing a terrific amazing job controlling the Zika Virus in his state.

Uh oh. Don't tell the Illinois Community Blood Services people because they don't trust that Rick Scott with, um, blood.

This is personal for me, because I have a very personal relationship with the Community Blood Services of Illinois people. I give them my own blood every 53 days. It's something I can donate to make the world a better place, and it doesn't cost me any money. I have a rare blood type but that doesn't really enter into it, except that the blood bank calls to make sure I show up and calls again if I fail to another appointment in 53 days. They are extra good at harassing you to get you in the door and giving you a free t-shirt when you're done donating. Every 53 days. That's how often you can donate. The Star Wars t-shirts when my son and I donated on May the Fourth were extra cool:

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So news stories about blood donation catch my eye. And this one really did: my regional blood center has started asking donors if they have been to SOUTH FLORIDA and if they have, they will not take their donation.

Travel questions for Blood donors to include Florida. The Community Blood Services of Illinois will begin asking prospective blood donors about travel to two counties in south Florida after reports of possible Zika Virus transmission. Those who have traveled to the affected region are asked not to give blood for a period of 28 days after their return. The counties affected in Florida are Miami-Dade and Broward Counties. Blood donation in those two counties was temporarily suspended last week.

So the Illinois Blood people are treating South Florida the exact same way they treat the jungles of Africa and Southeast Asia -- if you take the risk of travelling there, make sure you've been home for over a month and have no signs of insect-borne disease before we will take your blood donation.


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I wouldn't shake hands with Rick Scott, either, just to be on the safe side.

In more related news, Florida Senator Marco Rubio is now freaking out about Zika, too, even though the Senate, that he actually sits in when he's not avoiding that job he used to hate but now wants again more than ever, blocked Zika funding before going on vacation for seven weeks. Not to Florida, though, because have you SEEN the disease-carrying bugs down there?

Rubio said the onset of locally transmitted Zika was not only a health crisis, but also an economic one, considering that many tourists might rethink coming to South Florida because of the virus. He's meeting Thursday with Thomas Frieden, the director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, to discuss the Florida response.

Rubio doesn't dispute Congress' role in a slow response and has called for members of Congress to return from vacation to address the crisis. But he said it was clear now that was unlikely to happen and that it was time for the administration to do whatever it could.

And if you think there couldn't be anymore of a gigantic Republican clusterfk to this story than (a) Rick Scott's terrific-ness as seen in the Trump video above, (b) a Congress that is blaming the President from their vacation for not doing enough (Obama is sooo divisive!) and (c) the justifiable panic of the Illinois Blood Bank people, just look at what his Miami-Dade campaign manager decided to spout:

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No offense, Juan Fiol, but how much did you have to drink at the Miami Trump party before you pounded your fist on the bar and said something like that on the record?

I guess the Trump campaign is trying extra hard to lose every swing state.

But what if the virus spreads to neighboring states in some strange anti-Trump conspiracy, like Hillary-bot insects deciding to make Trump look bad by flying across state lines?

Has Rick Scott thought about building a wall and getting Zika to pay for it?

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