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Help Jason Chaffetz Find A New Twitter Handle

Clearly, "jasoninthehouse" isn't going to work anymore.
Help Jason Chaffetz Find A New Twitter Handle
Image from: Salt Lake City Tribune

Jason Chaffetz is going to need a new Twitter handle.

@jasoninthehouse is no longer going to be in the House. After family yadda yadda and prayerful boogaloo, the Chairman of the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee has announced that he has no more interest in Oversight (of a Republican Administration) or Government Reform. Or government in any form, apparently, for now.

“I have decided I will not be a candidate for any office in 2018,” he announced today, leaving open the possibility for other offices in other years, once the heat has died down.

Chaffetz’ announcement immediately presents a mystery: why would anyone with his career arc step away from national power in a district that – despite his town hall bumps – should be an easy win for himself?

@JasonOutHouse – if I may suggest a new handle – is trying to cut such speculation off (good luck!): “For those that would speculate otherwise, let me be clear that I have no ulterior motives. I am healthy. I am confident I would continue to be re-elected by large margins. I have the full support of Speaker Ryan to continue as Chairman of the Oversight and Government Reform Committee. That said, I have made a personal decision to return to the private sector.”

For the record, Chaffetz’s previous foray into the private sector was Nu-Skinning suckers via pyramid schemes “multi-level marketing.”

Also, for those of you keeping score at home, Chaffetz is a climate-denier, anti-vaxxer, ACA-hater, and Planned Parenthood attacker. He hates gays, women, net neutrality and town halls. He investigated the hell out of Benghazi, Benghazi, and Benghazi, but saw no reason to pursue the treason of General Michael T Flynn, Trump’s first NSC adviser who is now desperately trying to avoid prison by shopping his testimony to investigators who don’t appear to need it.

He also feels that the following things require ZERO House Oversight or Governmental Reforms: Trump and the Emoluments Clause, Trump and the Russians, Trump and the Hatch Act, Trump and Prosecutor Bribing, Trump and the IRS, Trump and the Fake Voter Fraud, and Trump and the Fake Wiretapping.

It’s as if, once Hillary lost, Jason lost his zest, his joie d’vivre, his drive for justice, his whole and entire raison d’être. Unless there was a Clinton Administration to blatantly libel, maliciously harass and falsely impugn, there was no more reason for Jason to be in the House.

I’m here to tell ya: there never was. But if it turns out that on top of all this he has committed obstruction of justice by not investigating the many high crimes and misdemeanors of the von Trump Crime Family, he’ll need another Twitter handle:


Originally published at

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