Donald Trashes McConnell In Bratty, Lie-Filled 'Statement'

We know it was ghostwritten, because everything was spelled correctly.
Donald Trashes McConnell In Bratty, Lie-Filled 'Statement'
Credit: YouTube Screenshot
By Aliza Worthington — February 17, 2021

The guy who used to host some fake "reality" TV show about business issued a long, whining rant about Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell. This dude is pissed, but I'm not sure if McConnell cares, or honestly, if any of us should care. But hey, I don't make the news, I just write about it.

I've got nothing against a GOP circular firing squad, so this whole thing is fine by me. But since I'm doing this, let me really do this. First of all, there is no way in hell Melania's husband wrote this.

"McConnell's dedication to business as usual, status quo policies, together with his lack of political insight, wisdom, skill, and personality, has rapidly driven him from Majority Leader to Minority Leader, and it will only get worse."

Forget about all the correct spelling and big words. Does anyone truly believe he knows how to use a comma properly?

Then Barron's dad rattles off all kinds of typically narcissistic bullsh*t about how he "single-handedly saved at least 12 Senate seats, more than eight in the 2020 cycle alone." Sure, Jan. He even claimed credit for McConnell's victory, saying McConnell was polling in the negatives in Kentucky until he swept in to endorse him.

Ivanka's Daddykins weirdly throws in something about McConnell's wife having business deals with China, so now McConnell has no credibility on China or something? Don't worry that she was also a member of his own cabinet, so wouldn't that make The Toupee Tyrant the one with the credibility problem on China? (Plus Ivanka pulled off some sweet copyright deals with China, if memory serves...)

But whatever, again, it's not like any of this makes sense, or attempts to be factual. We know what really happened is he was pissed McConnell said he was guilty AF of inciting the insurrection, so he spat something at Stephen Miller or Kellyanne Conway, who managed to turn it into a "statement" that was spell-checked and grammatically sound.

"Mitch is a dour, sullen, and unsmiling political hack..." does anyone really think the Future Defendant in the states of Georgia and New York knows what the word "dour" means?

Twitter was also uninterested and unimpressed.

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