May 17, 2024

Jury selection for Sen. Bob Menendez’s corruption trial began Monday, and “The Daily Show” host Jon Stewart broke down the allegations against him. The New Jersey senator and former chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee is accused of taking bribes from three businessmen, among other crimes. The evidence against Menendez includes 13 gold bars seized by authorities during a raid of his home 

"I don't mean to get sentimental here,” Stewart joked, “but in what other country in the world can a Cuban American senator work hand in hand with an Egyptian-born businessman to corner the halal meat market?"

Menendez’s defense team has indicated they will be arguing the gold bars in his possession are the result of "intergenerational trauma." Stewart mocked this dubious strategy, saying, "These are simply my emotional support gold bars." But for Stewart, this was just a starting point for a conversation about political corruption.

“You, sir, are an elected official in America's most respected legislative body. It's like a license to print money,” Stewart said. “You don't need to break the law so cartoonishly when the legal corruption in the Senate is so f---ing lucrative. Which brings us to our new segment—Senator Robert Menendez: How Dumb is You?"

Stewart pointed to a study published this year that found U.S. senators routinely outperformed the stock market by 12%, while hedge funds only outperformed the market by 7%. 

"And if you think it's because the average U.S. senator is just so smart, this is the average U.S. senator: Tommy Tuberville,” Stewart reminded viewers.  

An ex-football coach who doesn't know the three branches of government,” Stewart said. “Oh, but when it comes to the stock market, he sees the Matrix."

Stewart then mentioned egregiously suspicious trades made by various members of both major political parties and footage of their evasive responses to reporters’ questions. The rules for what constitutes corruption in Congress are pathetic, Stewart explained. 

"A pharma lobbyist cannot buy a senator a panini and some NyQuil, but through the PAC, they can pay for five-star hotels for Kirsten Gillibrand, luxury resorts for Ted Cruz, and even golf lessons for Rand Paul. It's all in Ayn Rand's famous book, 'Atlas Putting.'"

Stewart then showed a clip of Hunter Biden being asked whether or not he would have gotten the cushy job on the board of Ukrainian energy company Burisma if his last name wasn't Biden.

“I don't know. Probably not,” Biden said.

"Holy shit,” said Stewart. “Out of all the senators and representatives who dodged, and prevaricated, and wouldn't answer any f---ing questions—you know you're in trouble when the most honest and transparent person in a story of government corruption is the ex-crackhead."

On top of this, Stewart explained, the Supreme Court made it even more difficult to prosecute politicians for corruption with their McDonnell v. United States decision in 2016.

"Robert Menendez's gold bars in exchange for favorable legislation is obviously cartoon-corrupt,” Stewart concluded. “But for anyone out there who thinks the status quo of government patronage and influence is of an entirely different species than Menendez: How dumb is you?"

Republished with permission from Daily Kos.

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