March 24, 2010


The great Fred Clark at Slacktivist responds to Glenn Beck's "Principles and Values" portion of his 912 Project with the following handy tool:

Print out copies of the Glenn Beck Bingo card above and play along at home.

The rules are simple: Every time Beck violates any of his "values" by displaying its opposite, the first player to call him on it puts an "X" in the appropriate square.

When Beck is dishonest, misleading or mendacious, put an X in the square labeled "honesty."

When Beck is irreverent, mocking or demeaning that which is sacred, put an X in the square for "reverence."

When Beck savors and promotes despair, gleefully luxuriating in the ways in which he believes the world is going to Hell in a handbasket, put an X in the square for "hope."

When Beck tries to sell viewers something they don't need -- something neither useful nor beautiful -- put an X in the square for "thrift."

When Beck swaggers, is prideful or vain, or makes claims beyond his capacity to know or understand, put an X in the square for "humility."

When Beck is dismissive of those in need or offers reasons viewers shouldn't bother to assist them, put an X in the square for "charity."

When Beck is disingenuous, when his indignation is feigned or his outrage or tears are manufactured and rehearsed, put an X in the square for "sincerity."

When Beck is excessive or extreme or employs unqualified superlatives inappropriately, put an X in the square for "moderation."

When Beck is cowardly, backing down when confronted or lobbing pot-shots from the distance instead of face-to-face, or picking fights with those who don't have the media or financial resources to compete, put an X in the square for "courage."

When Beck refuses to accept personal responsibility or when he offers excuses for viewers so they don't have to -- when he blames Them for every woe facing Us, demonizing the Other and pointing the finger at the scapegoats whom he says are solely responsible for the ills of the world -- put an X in the square for "personal responsibility."

When Beck displays ingratitude, when he displays a sense of entitlement, insisting that his abundance and privilege are exclusively the result of merit, put an X in the square for "gratitude."

I've left "hard work" for last because, to his credit, Glenn Beck is not a lazy man. He does, however, habitually belittle the hard work of others, attributing their misfortune to a presumed laziness and disrespecting the calloused hands and broken backs of the poor. Whenever he does that, put an X in the square for "hard work."

The first player to get five X's in a row, vertically, horizontally or diagonally, wins.

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