Read time: 2 minutes

Stewart: GOP Response To Netanyahu Is The Longest Blowjob A Jewish Man Ever Received

Somebody had to say it.

After taking a shot at John Boehner for his ridiculous claim that inviting Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to come speak before Congress wasn't really just trying to put a "stick in the eye" of President Obama, Netanyahu's claim that he's speaking for all Jews, and President Obama's all too gentle response to Bibi's decision to come speak regardless of all of the criticism he's received, Stewart wrapped up his opening segment this Tuesday by summing up the GOP's response to his speech today.

STEWART: Oh my God, it was the State of the Union Address the Republicans wanted, delivered by the leader they wish they had. And Netanyahu wasted no time explaining why there was no time to waste.

After playing a bit of Netanyahu's fearmongering speech and warnings that Iran is about to get a nuke at any moment and reminding the viewers that we've been hearing this exact same sort of rhetoric from him for the last nineteen years, Stewart also reminded us of just how terribly wrong Netanyahu was on invading Iraq and taking out Saddam Hussein.

STEWART: We have to act. Look how Iran has expanded its power since the fall of Saddam Hussein and the destabilization of the region. I mean, what kind of an idiot wouldn't have seen that coming in 2002? [...]

Or the opposite. But in the House chamber, there was no such reflecting. Netanyahu wrapped his speech up and it was time for another ten minutes of applause. Whether Netanyahu achieved his goal of sabotaging a deal with Iran or mistakenly opened up a riff in the U.S./Israeli relations, one thing is certain. The in chamber response to this speech was by far the longest blow job a Jewish man has ever received.

Sad but true Jon. Sad but true.


Comments

We welcome relevant, respectful comments. Any comments that are sexist or in any other way deemed hateful by our staff will be deleted and constitute grounds for a ban from posting on the site. Please refer to our Terms of Service (revised 3/17/2016) for information on our posting policy.