June 28, 2017

Sen. Ron Johnson is commonly referred to as the stupidest man in Washington, and you can only imagine the stiff competition he beat for that title. Today, he proves why he's the champion. He babbles so incoherently, there's only an approximation of logic.

Morning Joe's Scarborough asked him how close the Republicans were to getting to 50 votes on the healthcare bill. RonJohn jumped at the chance to shill for it.

"First of all, let me correct the record. I never said I was no on this bill," he said, clearing up any lingering confusion about his surprising simulation of integrity.

"I was very hard no in terms of taking a vote this week. I never said I was no on this vote. That was absurd because we didn't have the information and now we're starting to get information -- and I've got some breaking news."

Oo oo, Ron, tell us!

"We gave you a chart, I'm not sure you're using it but the headline figure is 15 million Americans lose coverage the first year, using a baseline from March of 2016, when these markets were unstable but nowhere near where they are today."

Say what, Ron?

"The recent baseline from January 2017 not used on the individual market -- there's no difference. That was 7 million of the 15 million. It's hard to follow," he said.

Uh, yeah, Ron. Because it doesn't make sense!

"If we use up-to-date CBO baselines on the individual group market, instead of a loss of 7 million uninsured, IT'S NO DIFFERENCE, 19 and 19 million. That is big!"

Oh Ron, it's only big in that it gives you an insultingly absurd rationale for voting yes -- which is all you ever really wanted. You're insisting there will be no difference in the number of insured, and you would have to be an idiot to believe it.

"Because the distortion of the original CBO report is just wrong because it's comparing against a year and three-month-old information, so that's all I was asking for, guys.

What he was "asking for" was a way to cover his ass for this vote.

"We need more time, we need more information and here's the good news. The CBO score for the Senate bill shows about $200 billion of additional deficit reduction. In order to have this thing passed to match with the House, we only need $119 billion. That $200 billion extra deficit reduction will give us leeway to make sure we can get the support and pass this bill."

Um, sounds more like a rationale for a tax cut for the 1%, amirite?

"So it sounds like you're moving towards a yes vote. Is that correct?" Scarborough said. (Gee, Joe, you think?)

"Well, like Senator Murphy, these markets are collapsing. We have to do something. Anything we pass is not going to be perfect, so maybe what we have to do is the Democrats passed theirs on a partisan basis, maybe we've gotta do this and hopefully we can take their offer and work together to actually fix our health care system. I think that would be best for the American people."

Translation: We need some Democrats quick so we don't take the whole political hit on this reeking bag of elephant manure.

Yo, Wisconsin: You just picked this guy over Russ Feingold? What were you thinking?

Can you help us out?

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