Every time we think we have met Zero F*cks To Give Nancy Pelosi, she tightens up her game and takes us to the next level. Exhibit A: this morning's press conference. She spent the beginning absolutely destroying Comrade Trump's State of the Union lies as they related to the actual real president who preceded him: President Barack Obama. She knows how much Trump just loves comparing himself to Obama, so she thought she'd help out by making sure the press and everyone knew the truth about how he measured up. (SPOILER: It's poorly. Very, very poorly.) As always, Speaker Pelosi had the numbers at the tips of her fingers to prove that, as she said, what Trump inherited was not even close to a mess — it was momentum.
Inevitably, though, questions turned to her badass move after Trump's
Nuremberg rally State of the Union address: tearing up his speech on national TV. Because God knows, with a sure-to-be-rigged election coming up, Trump being acquitted of impeachment charges, vengeance on his mind, the Constitution in tatters, the Supreme Court set to take up reproductive rights, Wuhan virus, Trump opening up protected land to drilling, separating toddlers from their terrified parents at the border, not vaccinating them and letting them die in freezing cages, the REAL news is that a lady-person did something "rude" to a big powerful manly penis-haver on the teevee.
Not today, reporters. Not today.
SPEAKER PELOSI: No, I did not. No, I did not. I tore up a manifesto of mistruths. It's very hard for us to get you to talk about the issues that we are working on, HR3, infrastructure and the rest. He misrepresented all of that. It was necessary to get the attention of the American people to say this is not true. And this is how it affects you. And I don't need any lessons from anybody, especially president of the United States, about dignity. Dignity. Is it okay to start saying "Four more years!" in the House of Representatives? It's just unheard of. Is it unheard of for the president to insult people there who don't share his view, as well as to misrepresent, present falsehoods, some would use the word lie, I don't like to use the word lie, about what he is saying. So, no, I think it was completely, entirely appropriate, and considering some of the other exuberances within me, the courteous thing to do.
That last sentence was just the Bad B*tch way of saying, "Considering I should have wiped my ass with that speech, tearing it up was pretty mild."
Dignity? You want to talk to her about DIGNITY and Trump?
Then she squashed the notion that she will need to invite him back next year, and spanked the media for focusing on HER behavior, instead of the grotesque behavior on the parts of Trump and the GOP that prompted her reaction.
SPEAKER PELOSI: Next year we will have a new President of the United States. That is an absolute imperative for our country, for our Constitution, for the land that we love from sea to shining sea, which he degrades almost every day but several times a week, for who we are as a people, a nation of immigrants, unless you're blessed to be born a Native American, whom he denigrates, and our values, which he just is disloyal to the Constitution, degrades the environment, denigrates who we are as a people, and undervalues who we are as a great country, that is a good country where people care about each other and where there's a sense of community.
It's appalling the things that he says. And then you say to me tearing up his falsehoods, isn't THAT the wrong message? No, it isn't. It's just I have tried to be gracious with him, I'm always dignified, I thought that was a very dignified act compared to my exuberances, as I said. But we will not allow any president to use that Capitol, that chamber of the House of Representatives, of the People's House as a backdrop for him. Now, all presidents have guests. That was not what State of the Union. That was his state of mind. We wanted a State of the Union. Where are we, where are we going, and the rest. Not, "Let me just show you how many guests I can draw, and let me say how I can give a medal of honor." Do it in your own office. We don't come in your office and do Congressional business. Why are you doing that here? Quite frankly, when he started talking about someone with stage four cancer, I thought he was -- I don't know what stage John Lewis's cancer is at, when he started talking about someone with cancer, we thought he was going to talk about John Lewis, a hero in our country. Come on.
So in any event, I feel very liberated. I feel very liberated. I feel that I've extended every possible courtesy, I've shown every level of respect, I say to my members all the time there's no such thing as an eternal animosity. There are eternal friendships, but you never know on what cause you may come together with somebody you may have perceived as your foe right now. Everybody is a possible ally in whatever comes next. E pluribus unum. From many, one. How many we be, or how different we be. They want us always to remember we were one and they, our founders, had their differences, as do we. So, again, I extended a hand of friendship to him, to welcome him as the president of the United States, to the People's House. It was also an act of kindness, because he looked to me like he was a little sedated. He looked that way last year, too. He didn't want to shake hands. That was that. That meant nothing to me. That had nothing to do with my tearing up, that came much later in...you know, I'm a speed reader. I just went right through that thing. I knew what was coming. When I saw the compilation of falsehoods but when I heard, like. the first quarter or third, then I started to think, there has to be something that clearly indicates to the American people that this is not the truth. And he has shredded the truth in his speech, he's shredding the Constitution in his conduct. I shredded his "State of his Mind" address. Thank you all very much.
DAYUM, NANCY! "It was also an act of kindness, because he looked to me like he was a little sedated..." She is soooo smooth. Is this the Baltimore/San Francisco version of "Bless his heart?" If this is Nancy Pelosi liberated, we are here for it. Tell us how it is, Speaker Pelosi, you haven't been wrong about Trump, yet.