January 23, 2010

Keith responds to Jon Stewart who went after him for his hyperbolic comments of late which have been short and sweet and many times amounting to not much more than an F.U. out of Keith to someone who has drawn his ire. Keith to his credit agreed that he needs to tone it down.

OLBERMANN: Into each life, some rain must fall. You`ll often hear Rachel Maddow and I lumped in together with Jon Stewart of the "Daily Show" as the only truth tellers in mainstream television.

Now, this week, Mr. Stewart was critical, first, of Rachel, and last night, of me. So, the old truth telling list has gotten shorter by one name or maybe two or, I guess, maybe all three.

Seriously, my response to Mr. Stewart`s critique will not mean much unless you see it. So, I`ll show it with two prefaces only.

One, Jon, you invited me on the show in 2003 and I said I couldn`t make it because of the taping time. It didn`t mean I couldn`t make it forever. What, you can`t pick up a phone and give a jingle?

Two, I think it should be noted when Affleck did this, he didn`t have a teleprompter. That guy is a technician like Rembrandt was a technician.


JON STEWART, TALK SHOW HOST: Obviously, with the stakes so high in this week`s Massachusetts Senate race, emotions ran high on both sides of the contest peaking on election eve.


OLBERMANN: In Scott Brown, we have an irresponsible, homophobic, racist, reactionary, ex-nude model, teabagging supporter of violence against women and against politicians with whom he disagrees.


STEWART: I understand you may disagree somewhat with Senator Brown. But two things: A, a Massachusetts Republican is still considered, like, a gay Democrat in other parts of the country, so. And, B, I think that`s the harshest description of anyone I`ve ever heard uttered on MSNBC. And that includes descriptions of the guys that star in your weekend prison program.


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I pulled his brain out and took a bite out of it.


STEWART: By the way, he lost his congressional race by three points.

STEWART: But, all right, Keith, I understand it`s emotional. You probably give it a day, you`ll see you went too far.


OLBERMANN: I need to apologize for comments made here last night about the Republican candidate.


STEWART: Thank you, thank you. It was a little much. It was an emotional night.


OLBERMANN: I`m sorry. I left out the word "sexist."


STEWART: I see you`re looking to plant your flag on this one, all right. Testify.


OLBERMANN: I said Mr. Brown was an ex-nude model -- specifically in the June 1982 issue of "Cosmopolitan" magazine.


STEWART: The focus: soft. The trail: happy.

STEWART: Point Olbermann. Next.


OLBERMANN: I said Mr. Brown was irresponsible -- specifically he swore at a hall full of high school students in 2007.


STEWART: Or, as they remember it, the best assembly ever!

STEWART: OK. For those charges, I mean, I swear in front of an audience full of high school students every night. So -- oh, which by the way, I forgot. Hey, kids (EXPLETIVE DELETED).

STEWART: Now, let`s get into some of the harder chargers.


OLBERMANN: I said Mr. Brown was sexist -- specifically nine years ago, he said a woman Massachusetts state senator had, quote, "alleged family responsibilities."


STEWART: That`s it?

STEWART: Nine years ago, he said something I`m not even sure I understand. You think that -- you think that`s sexist? I know a guy who cheated on his cancer-stricken wife and then denied paternity.

STEWART: . earlier in the show.

Here`s the capper and perhaps the most damning allegation for a man who has two daughters that he cleared seems to love. That he supports violence against women.


OLBERMANN: Specifically, this past Sunday, when a man at a Brown rally shouted they should, quote, "shove a curling iron up Martha Coakley`s butt," Brown responded by answering, "We can do this." Or, if that remark was unconnected to the shout, he never refuted, condemned, nor disassociated himself from the call to violence and even sexual assault.


STEWART: Come on!

STEWART: If I had to refute or disassociate myself from every offensive statement some jackass from my audience shouted out, I`d never get my show on the air.


STEWART: We can do this!

STEWART: You know, I think it`s time for a special comment on the subject of Keith Olbermann.

For years, sir, your outrage was warranted based in fact, saturated in reason, marinated in malice but tenderize with clever of careful consideration once wielded so masterfully by the demigods of discourse whose very chair you sit, Murrow, Cronkite, Spiceland.

You fought your fight.

STEWART: And you fought it furiously and forthrightly. But isn`t a fight if ill-foughten folly? Fer-haps. How far, sir, how far will you fall?

Once you toiled in the fields of the factual, equal parts punditry and profundity with prodigious prose that was as powerful as it was purple.

But now this, now this, sir! This, sir! This, sir! This, sir! And know, sir -- this teleprompter is not stuck. I am doing something called repetition for dramatic emphasis. You, sir, invented it. I like it.

But now, you`re just kind of calling people names. To it, you said this of Joseph Isadora Lieberman, Democrat, Connecticut, a senatorial prostitute of Roger Ailes` fat ass; Chris Wallace, a monkey posing as a newscaster; Rush Limbaugh, a big back of mashed up jackass.

STEWART: All right. All right, I`ll give you that. I`ll give you that one.

STEWART: I`ll give you that one. That was a good one.

And of Michelle Malkin you said, "a mindless, morally bankrupt, knee- jerk, fascistic mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it," end quote, that, my fine-feathered friend sounds a lot more like violence against women than anything Scott Brown ever said. You can`t resort to childish attacks as hominem as they are ad-nauseum.

You`ve ceded the high ground, and now, you wallow in the fetid swamp of baseless -- of baseless name-calling. And as we both know, sir -- that`s my thing!

STEWART: It is beneath you. It is next to me. A man of your intellect need not be -- me. Petty, pompous, pusillanimous or poopy head.


OLBERMANN: Fetid swamp you say, sir -- it`s from a guy who reached his professional apex when he was the host of short attention span theater, 1991? You want some baseless name-calling? You are -- no you know what? You were right. I have been a little over the top lately. Point taken. Sorry.

Can you help us out?

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