May 5, 2015

Jon Stewart opened his show this Tuesday night with a look at the three latest additions to the 2016 GOP clown car, Carly Fiorina, Ben Carson and Mike Huckabee and the fact that the three of them all have about zero chance of ever becoming president, but soon realized during his next segment that we were going to need some method to start "narrowing the field" with the number of entrants we already have to the race.

He decided we should start this week with a game he calls, "Let's Get Rid of Ted Cruz!" and explained why it was Ted Cruz who "cannot live up to the extremely high standards set for a candidate by, Ted Cruz."

Cue Ted Cruz railing against President Obama for spending all of his time fundraising, and Ted Cruz's promise to keep Loretta Lynch from becoming the next Attorney General, followed by the news that Ted Cruz was the only senator who couldn't be bothered to show up for the vote. Of course hypocrite Ted Cruz was off fundraising and missed the vote.

STEWART: I think they see how disappointed Ted Cruz will be in you, you. So a slight disconnect on the fundraising tip, but onto the next round of our game, where once again we start with some strong Ted Cruz criticism.

Cue Ted Cruz accusing President Obama of inflaming racial tensions and dividing Americans instead of bringing us together.

Cruz also fell short, Stewart argued, when he accused Obama of exacerbating racial tensions during his presidency, only to fumble and “take like a minute” to rephrase his statement when CNN asked him to provide specific examples.

And while Cruz accuses Democrats of relying on strawmen arguments, Stewart said, he has no problem complaining about “liberal fascism” or a “jihad” being waged against anti-LGBT laws in Arkansas and Indiana.

“So you want a president who can bring people together,” Stewart said sarcastically. “Who understands that, if you’re pro-marriage equality, you are the same as ISIS. Got it.”

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