Entitled White Man, Todd Starnes, Whines About Wearing A Mask When He Went To Buy A Toaster

By Red Painter — May 9, 2020

We all know that the most oppressed group in all of history is (checks notes) White Christian Republican Men. They were sold into slavery, forbidden from drinking at certain water fountains or from riding in the front of the bus. They didn't get the right to vote until the last century. They have never won the Presidency. Hell, they don't even get to control their own bodies.

Wait. Wrong groups.

White men control pretty much EVERYTHING.

So, imagine Todd Starnes frustration when he was told by the mean store person that he had to not only wear a mask — but he had to use hand sanitizer — DURING A GLOBAL PANDEMIC. Yes, to put others' safety before your own convenience is hard for the White Christian Republican Man. After all, he has been raised to expect everyone else to bend to his will, not the other way around.

Here is Todd's super whiny tweet:

Dropped by a department store to buy a toaster oven. Mandatory hand sanitizer squirt and mask. One way aisles and if you deviate from the approved zone for customers - they sternly lecture you. The country as we know it has been destroyed. And I still don’t have a toaster.

— toddstarnes (@toddstarnes) May 8, 2020

Twitter had thoughts:

Over 78,000 Americans no longer have a life anymore because they died from #Covid_19. But so sorry you had to use hand sanitizer.

— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) May 9, 2020

But Congressman, he is also having to live without a toaster. Without a toaster! A more staggeringly heart wrenching tale has never been told.

— Walter Shaub (@waltshaub) May 9, 2020

Grow the fck up. Stop assuming the whole world revolves around YOU. https://t.co/8hcyU2d1YK

— Karoli (@Karoli) May 8, 2020

I heard Katie Miller has a toaster if you want. No hand sanitizer needed. Just a hug and a toaster.

— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) May 9, 2020

Todd, please DM me your address. I'll send you a top of the line toaster in exchange for you to stop whining like a little child about public health precautions.

— Yashar Ali 🐘 (@yashar) May 8, 2020

I’m so sorry for your loss.

— Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) May 9, 2020

Just in case you thought White Privilege wasn't a thing.

— Dr. Rob Davidson (@DrRobDavidson) May 9, 2020

Dear God he left this tweet up.

— Brian Tyler Cohen (@briantylercohen) May 9, 2020

my uncle hid in a basement in Poland for five years during world war two

— Jeff Tiedrich (@itsJeffTiedrich) May 9, 2020

John McCain couldn’t get a toaster at the Hanoi Hilton either. Totally the same

— Devin Nunes’ cow 🐮 (@DevinCow) May 9, 2020

This one made me LOSE IT.

pic.twitter.com/WhxWDuT0LY

— Krishan Patel (@IAmKrishanPatel) May 9, 2020

Mic drop:

If you don’t mind a used appliance, I know a few recently dead people who aren’t using theirs anymore.

— Benjamin Dreyer (@BCDreyer) May 8, 2020

Yes, Todd. YOUR struggle is the real one. You are the hero. Maybe the next Banksy portrait will be of YOU!

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