November 13, 2021

Behold another stunning moment in the murder trial of Kyle Rittenhouse, wherein Judge Bruce Schroeder reinforces his own self-assessment that he is a complete and total idiot when it comes to technology.

Because he cannot let go of his absurd decision to support the defense team's brazen lie that enlarging a picture on an iPad "added pixels" to the image and thus, altered the image (NARRATOR'S VOICE: It doesn't do that.) Schroeder went on a two-minute rant about how he takes screenshots of texts he receives, emails them to himself, and then tries to enlarge them.

Listen to this legally bloated moron hold forth on something about which he knows nothing, and please also note that his ignorance likely significantly influenced the outcome of a goddamned murder trial.

"Um, when I get messages from my friends, my few remaining friends, they come as texts. And they start belittling me, or whatever, in one way or another, and they can be quite lengthy, the exchange that's going on between them and us. But they're entertaining."

Sure they are, Sparky.

"And I don't know how to save text messages. I haven't figured that out, and you know, I have a lot of things that I'm doing, so that's a low priority for me to figure out how to save a text message."

You don't say. You're very important, there, aren't ya? That's your humble brag, isn't it? Subtle.

"And I don't wanna leave them on my phone forever. I want them off. I want it clean. So when I'm looking at it I'm looking just at the fresh stuff. So then I do a screenshot. And then I email it to myself. To save it."

Great googly-moggly, judge, you're practically Thomas Edison.

"But I found, to my distress, that some of 'em are pretty long. And they show up in my email like this! (*shows courtroom his phone screen*) Like a little ribbon down the center of the page. Some of them are even smaller than this."

Oh, no. You're in distress over this? Imagine the distress a murder victim's family might feel sitting in your courtroom listening to you go on about this sh*t in all your ignorant mediocre glory.

"Well. Then I go to open them up. And it's just...a blur."


"You were talking the other day, one of you two, about just like the cell phone where you can expand a picture and make it bigger. Well, it's not making it any bigger, well, it's making it bigger, but it's nothing but a blur. That was my concern that I wanted to ask Mr. Armstrong about, and I guess I should have, for him to explain it better for me, as to how that can be reliable. Because it isn't reliable for me in getting my messages."

That wasn't his concern. That was the defense team's LIE. Schroeder adopted it as his concern, just like he's practically adopted Kyle Rittenhouse as his godson. And no amount of explaining from any expert would have penetrated that thick, white supremacist skull of Schroeders, unencumbered though it may be by the KKK hood he wears in the privacy of his own home.

Twitter was aghast.

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