We all knew that Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.) was on his way out, especially after becoming the first Speaker in history to be ousted from the role. So, he dramatically announced his departure, saying he would exit the House at the end of the year.
Goodbye to the man who, for one second in his miserable life, called out President Circus Peanut for his role in inciting the Jan. 6th attack on our Capitol, then did an epic takesie backsies while awkwardly performing fellatio on the disgraced one-term president to get back in his good graces before he told MAGA on him. It's a bipartisan thing: MAGA hates him, and Democrats fantasize about him sliding down a 50-foot razor into a pile of salt.
But he's still Marge's Snuggle Bunny—# Winning. Yup, the failed author and member of the chaos crew isn't taking this very well. She wrote that she hopes that "no one dies."
She's the only one who didn't know he would not last. The only one. And now, MAGA will turn on Marge, etc. MAGA can't fix things. They only know how to break them.
Their relationship was bonkers from the start. Lest we forget that he let Marge hold the gavel? For that alone, he should be shunned by society forever. We're only surprised he didn't assist former President Ranty McTinyDick in becoming Speaker just to own the libs.
Here's our boy saying that he never quits. OK, Mr. Man.
Worst kept secret in the world.
The question is, what is Kev going to do with all of those delicious PAC dollars he has stashed? Revenge, of course. He is a child. Nothing more. He is a total bellend.
Just keep telling yourself, 'You're good enough, You're smart enough, and doggone it, people like you,' Kevin, then maybe all these bad things will go away. Joking!
Perhaps he can go into business with Lumpy on some Digital Donnie Cards. There are so many opportunities for Kevin now, especially if he has that nazi land whale of a former President by his side. Of course, Lumpy is probably about to dump him, too.
Fuck you, Kevin. But thanks for leaving Republicans with a razor-thin majority.
