After what felt like forever because even a minute of listening to Ted Cruz talk feels like an hour, he finally announced what all of us knew. Should Ted Cruz be the nominee for President (which he will not be), he will nominate Carly Fiorina as his running mate, which also will never happen because he will never be nominated.
But watch this weird announcement, and especially after he says her name. He bobbles his head around like he's just done something that he's bowing for. It's weird. And creepy.
Here are some of my favorite tweets from his announcement.
On DNC call, Sen. Boxer predicts Fiorina-Cruz merger will be as successful as her merger with Compaq + HP. #ouch
— Jackie Kucinich (@JFKucinich) April 27, 2016
This moment was kind of bizarre, too.
The system works if you’re wealthy, like Trump or Clinton, but not for the rest of us, says multimillionaire Carly Fiorina.
— Nicole Hemmer (@pastpunditry) April 27, 2016
From TPM's Josh Marshall:
I get that Cruz is neurologically incapable of experiencing loss of dignity like normal people. But why did Carly agree to this?
— Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) April 27, 2016
Maybe it had to do with that $500,000 contribution the Cruz SuperPAC sent to Carly? Just sayin'.
Carly "I inspired a nutjob to shoot up a Planned Parenthood" Fiorina
I need to work on my nickname game
— Jesse LaGreca (@JesseLaGreca) April 27, 2016
No, Jesse. I think you nailed that one straight up.
And this one, which sums things up nicely.
Every time I think this election can't get any more insane, it proves me wrong.
— Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) April 27, 2016
Oh, maybe one more. This was retweeted by Planned Parenthood's Twitter account:
— Above Average (@AboveAverage) April 27, 2016
But hey! He got an hour of eyeballs. That was the only goal.