I am going to come out and say what many in the main stream media refuse to do: Trump is a lying liar who lies his way out of every lie he gets caught in. He will have the words "world's biggest liar" on his tombstone. He lies so much, his nose grows more by the day (or maybe his gut, as shown by his "bigly" weight gain of late). Regardless, he lies. About everything. I would honestly be shocked if he chose to tell the truth for once.
What is today's lie? There are many to pick from, but I am choosing to talk about the one that involves him being full of sh*t. Because this one has to do with, you guessed it, a colonoscopy.
Just a quick recap - yesterday Trump went on Dr. Oz to reveal how amazingly healthy he was. During that taping, he presented Dr. Oz with a few sheets of paper. We have no idea what was on those, to be honest. It could have been the recipe to Trump's famous chile or maybe a map to a hidden treasure or maybe it was just blank pieces of paper with doodles on them. Who knows.
Today, Trump released a letter from his hippie dippy, long haired "long time personal physician", aka Dr. Bornstein. In that letter, outside of declaring him the most healthy and gorgeous specimen of man to ever walk the earth, he mentioned that Trump had a colonoscopy on July 10, 2013.
As anyone over the age of 40 knows, a colonoscopy is a fairly routine procedure in and of itself, but it requires a disgusting night of prep, general anesthesia and a yucky recovery period as you readjust to eating normal food.
Apparently, Trump must really be amazing, because Buzzfeed dug through his prolific Twitter feed and found out that he was tweeting ALL day long. My god, the man must really be superhuman.
Or maybe he just lied hid orange-skinned face off.
Here are a few of his many tweets:
Early start to the day:
Recovered fast from the anesthesia:
Watching Fox and congratulating Gretchen Carlson on getting her own show. Irony, table of one:
And finally, a little Obamacare bashing:
Ending the day with a little "Deep Thoughts With Donnie"
I would make a joke about how Trump clearly didn't have a colonoscopy because he is still full of sh*t, but I don't want to sink to his level.