April 10, 2017

(Note: Parts of this video are not safe for work.)

As our readers know, Bill O'Reilly has had a very bad April. Last week it was revealed that the Fox News host has been bailed out by his network on five separate occasions in settlements totalling $13 million, because he can't seem to stop sexually harassing female employees.

JOHN OLIVER: Yes, Bill O’Reilly, who scientists hypothesize is kind of a dense nebula of boner and racism, has been paying out settlements for alleged harassment for years, and the details are pretty disturbing here, with the victims claiming things like verbal abuse, lewd comments, unwanted advances, and phone calls in which it sounded as if Mr. O’Reilly was masturbating.

And in case you needed audio evidence of what that would sound like, Oliver played clips from an O'Reilly self-narrated audio novel, in which BillO reads the naughty bits of a trash novel he wrote.

I remember when that first came out in 2009. I made this, which actually includes more smut talk from O'Reilly than last night's HBO offering? I'm saddened.

(not work safe)

Back to John Oliver...who then points out that none other than brother-in-sexual-harassment-arms Donald Trump has weighed in on the O'Reilly "controversy," suggesting that O'Reilly is a good man and shouldn't have settled the harassment cases. And of course, O'Reilly's show has been bleeding advertisers all week.

OLIVER: To recap this story for you: Bill O’Reilly needs advertisers and Donald Trump needs to understand sexual harassment. And here is where we come in.

We have produced an ad to educate Donald Trump to air during The O’Reilly Factor in New York and D.C. We submitted it to stations on Friday, but weirdly, we haven’t heard back from them since—which is a little surprising, because we are one of the only advertisers offering to buy time on his show at the moment.

Last Week Tonight's ever popular "catheter cowboy" is again featured in the proposed ad, and once again he is speaking directly to Donald Trump:

CATHETER COWBOY: Repeated unwanted sexual advances or obscene remarks in the workplace constitutes sexual harassment. If there’s a power disparity between the two parties, well, that’s about as inappropriate as lubricating a catheter with hot sauce, partner. Why would you do that? I do not like pain when I cath, and if you’ve got a friend who was accused of something like that over and over again, I might think twice about defending him, because that just contributes to a culture where women don’t want to come forward.

And I know you might not care about that. But at some level, you gotta know: you are blowing this. You. Are. Blowing. This.

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