October 12, 2021

It's a well-known, scientifically-proven phenomenon that when you become a conservative, your sense of humor shrivels up and dies. Thankfully, the rest of us with brains can enjoy Jen Psaki's brutalizing Ted Cruz with her pointed sarcasm while humorless Fox "reporter" Jacqui Heinrich* sits there fuming.

Robinson asked, "What's the White House response to people who say vaccine mandates have reduced the workforce and contributed to this problem?"

Psaki answered, "Well, I know world-renowned business, travel, and health expert Senator Ted Cruz has made that point, but I wouldn't say that that is widely acknowledged, or even echoed by business leaders who have implemented these mandates, by health experts who have conveyed the way to get out of the pandemic is to ensure we're doing exactly the steps the president has announced, and we're working to implement."


Usually when a fake reporter comes at her with a "some people say" framing, Psaki makes them squirm by simply asking them to name names. I guess today Psaki decided to shake things up and go after Cruz for sh*ts and giggles, and I gotta say, it works for me.

She continued, "It doesn't mean it isn't hard and challenging, of course it is. We're in the middle of a global pandemic. But ultimately, the job of the president of the United States is to lead. Is to follow the advice of health experts. Is to ensure that he is protecting the lives of people across the country," she explained, before addressing the Southwest Airlines troubles and debunking the rumor that they had to do with vaccine mandates.

"So, I know there was a little hub-bub over the course of the last few days over Southwest Airlines, we now know that some of those claims were absolutely false, and actually the issues were completely unrelated to vaccine mandates, but again, what we've seen, business to business across the country is that this is the way to save lives, create more certainty, it's good for the economy, and it's something we're looking forward to implementing."

Senator Cruz couldn't be reached for comment, as he was contacting his travel agent to see when the next flight to Cancun became available.

*An earlier version of this article incorrectly identified this "reporter" as Emerald Robinson. The author regrets the error.

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