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BREAKING: Hope Hicks Resigning As White House Communications Director

Breaking news from the White House
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Wow, after spending the entire day yesterday testifying in front of the House Intelligence Committee, Hope Hicks dropped a bombshell: SHE IS RESIGNING.

The 29-year old Hicks has served as the White House communications director for the last five months after a tumultuous revolving door of previous staffers in the same position. Prior to joining the White House, she was a model with no other experience. Apparently, that was enough.

She did not say what her next job would be...but I suspect it involves serving as a witness for Bob Mueller.

Someone provided this statement (saying it was from Donald Trump, sure):

“Hope is outstanding and has done great work for the last three years. She is as smart and thoughtful as they come, a truly great person. I will miss having her by my side but when she approached me about pursuing other opportunities, I totally understood. I am sure we will work together again in the future.”

Mooch, now is your chance.

Update: Gratitude to Parker Molloy on Twitter for this lovely In Memoriam video for Trump White House staffers.

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