Earlier today I received a text message from my son, laughing that Trumpers didn't get their wall, but they did get a cave. As we were laughing, Sean Hannity was trying hard to bail out the sinking ship of state known as the Trump administration.
During his radio show, he reassured his listeners that it will be all right in the end.
“Some of you say ‘he didn’t get any money for the wall,'” Hannity observed. “No he didn’t, but he’s going to.”
Oh! He's going to! Of course, by then the "wall" will be redefined as the border security measures Democrats support, including drones, electronic detection measures, repairing existing fences, and more. So maybe that's what Hannity was talking about?
In another case, a sad caller told Hannity he's just down in the dumps over the cave, but again, Hannity told him to buck up, because His Hero would come through.
Hannity once again assured the caller that Trump would come through in the end. "He's the one that then will make the decision alone on February 15," he soothed. "And he will decide either to shut the government down or go the national emergency route."
Sean Hannity is bailing out a sinking ship with a tin cup. First of all, the government will NOT shut down again. I can think of two specific reasons why it won't. First, because I can magically predict that the rescheduled State of the Union address will take place sometime after February 16th, at Speaker Nancy Pelosi's invitation. And second, because I do not believe Mitch McConnell will do anything on Trump's say-so again.
Donald Trump will not sacrifice his evening in the national spotlight again. Instead, he'll co-opt all of the Democratic ideas about border security, spin them into a tale that they're a very special, uniquely American "wall," Hannity and Rush Limbaugh will absolutely back him up, and Ann Coulter will pout on Bill Maher's show as she and Laura Ingraham slide closer and closer to right-wing obscurity.
Bookmark this and tell me what I get wrong.