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Hilarious Debate Commentary From The Late Show And Esquire

Stephen Colbert and Matt Miller have the best words. Not you, Donald.

The best observations of current events seem to always come from our source of laughter and, lately, sanity: satirists like Matt Miller of and the Stephen Colbert of The Late Show.. Thanks to their quick-witted humor, we are invited into their brilliant comedic minds and treated to their version of events, which make us smile and laugh a little harder.

Generally, Colbert tapes his show in the late afternoon. Colbert delayed his usual taping so he can include what was an epic source of comedy material and did a memorable, live show. He noticed the obvious disparity in expectations of the two candidates for this first debate:

"For Hillary to win she had to be confident but not smug; knowledgeable, but not a know it all; charming but not affected; commanding but not shrill," Colbert said. "Also, likable, warm, authoritative, and not coughing. Meanwhile, Donald Trump had to not commit murder on camera."

Donald pathetically attempted to deny his total disregard for science and acted as if he didn't say that man-made climate change is a hoax. Once again, Donald forgets that the Internet is FOREVER.

Donald seemed awfully thirsty, fidgety and snively. So, Stephen's observation hit the nail on the head, which was exactly what was on the minds of many viewers, especially those who remember the wild partying days of Studio 54 and the movie Scarface.

Matt Miller writes:

This being an election season mostly analyzed through various memes, the real takeaway from a night devoid of meaningful political discourse was Trump's incessant sniffling. "Trump sounded like he was fighting off a cold with cocaine," Colbert pointed out. "He sounded like the coked up best man in the bathroom of a wedding."

Trump said many words during that 90 minutes last night. Many of them made absolutely no sense, like his plan for combating cyber crime, which Colbert likened to "unplugging terrorism and plugging it back in just to reboot the middle east." Or when he said his best quality was his temperament: "Of course we'll never know if his temperament is his strongest asset if he won't release his tax returns," Colbert said. While he didn't have quite the spectacle of his RNC and DNC live shows, Colbert worked in a tight timeframe to deliver some solid jokes and analysis of the debate.

Colbert also mentioned the total lack of preparedness by Trump. He hilariously put it:

Hillary was so prepared, my nickname for her is Preparation H. ...She's already proved in the primary that she can soothe the Bern.

Don't become complacent because Hillary so far out-performed Trump, the media wants a horse race, so be prepared for anything. The polls change at the drop of a hat, so we all must remain vigilant to avoid a tragic Drumpf Dictatorship.

Article updated to reflect Matt Miller as author of the Esquire article.

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